Hello! I don't know where to start... I just made an account at the first suicide forum I could find and... I dont know. For a few months I have been thinking about life and all that. It feels like I dont belong here. I've started thinking that all of this is just temporary and that I will soon end it all because, I don't know, I'm just sad and I don't want this anymore. I have trouble admiting this to myself but I've decided that I will have to talk to someone about this. It feels like the easiest way out is just... the easy way out. None of my friends or family knows about this and I dont want them to know about it. Because then they will feel bad. A daily struggle is when I go out on the balcony and smoke. Everytime I wonder what way to take, the door or jump down (I live really high up). I don't actually know what more to write so... I guess that's all for now. Thank you for reading.