Hi everyone!

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by malenka, May 23, 2008.

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  1. malenka

    malenka Member

    I am OK, but someone in my family commited suicide 2 months ago.
    I am so angry, to the point that I don't sleep. Trying to tie up everything, what led my sister in law to taking her own life?
    Her son and her partner never got on, but things seemed to escalate prior to her killing herself. The son and partner can't even get their stories straight, about when and who saw her last and what was the conversation. Was it something one of them said to her that morning that pushed her over the edge? Why are they not telling the truth. Why didn't she leave a note?

    The rest of the family(her mother, her other brother, and her sister) can't bring themselves to deal with the loss.It is left to me and my husband, to pick up the pieces, to keep returning to the scene(her house), to organise funeral, to ID the body(because her son couldn't), to hire solicitors for the estate, to clean the house, and worst of all to act as mediators between her son and her partner.

    She took her own life, but right now I feel that she took a lot of my own. I am so angry at her, I am angry at her son and her partner for contributing to her misery with their constant fights and bullyings, ultimatiums to choose one.

    I am angry to the rest of the family for not dealing with the aftermath, for not helping me and my husband, even someone to go feed the fish once a week until the estate is settled will be great help. By the way, the son will inherit 100%, he has known that all along but plays the feel sory for me, still.

    We didn't have chance to grieve, I am slowly running out of power, I am tired, I am irritable, I even think that I am falling in a dark space, reaching for people to hear me, to help me. Can't ask that of my family, because I am the one who has been their rock.

    I though I know what suicide does to the people left behind. Now I know I had no clue.
  2. nagisa

    nagisa Staff Alumni

    Welcome to SF, malenka. I am so sorry for the loss for your sister-in-law. :( I'm also sorry for all the stress it has put on you and your husband. Your family needs to realize all you are doing and how unfair it is to put all this on you. You deserve time to grieve. Again, I'm so sorry for your loss. If you ever want to talk, you can PM me. Please take care of yourself. :hug:
  3. SmilePretty

    SmilePretty Staff Alumni

    welcome to sf malenka

    i know how hard it is to lose friend to suicide, though not a family member. my thoughts and prayers are with you. if you would ever like to talk PM me or message me on msn.
  4. Lead Savior

    Lead Savior Well-Known Member

    Welcome to the forum
  5. Gunner12

    Gunner12 Well-Known Member

    I don't know how I can help, all I can do is hope that things settle down.

    Welcome to the forums!

    I hope the others will be able to help.
  6. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    welcome to the forum :hug:
  7. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    I am so sorry to hear about your sister-in-law. Suicide has so many affects we can never begin to realize them all. Make sure you have some type of support system for yourself while you are trying to be strong for everyone else. I am glad you found us as we are a supportive community. You can come here and share thoughts and feelings without fear of being judged. Feel free to PM me if you would like. My box is open and I will answer as soon as I can. Take care. :hug:
  8. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni

    hello and welcome to the siteq
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