Hi guys in serious need of support *trig*

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by TinkerLoop, Nov 22, 2007.

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  1. TinkerLoop

    TinkerLoop Well-Known Member

    heya guys,

    guess my worlds just caved in you all probably think i have it all a full time job constant income. nephews etc so it probs wont make sense to you what im saying. But i'm not even close to having anything valuable im my life and i mean truely valuable. what ive got is worthless to me right now i just want to be free and happy.

    i have no internet at home just been signed of work for a a week im suicidal trying to act to those who know me like it dont really matter but i guess if they know me that well they will know that is by far from true.

    Jodi if your reading this miss you and need you like hell right now very worried about you.

    sorry guys
  2. andyc68

    andyc68 Guest

    hi tinker
    like you i suppose i have things in my life others would deem of worth yet to me i have nothing and i don't think i ever will now, what i did have of value was ripped away and left me with the broken fragments of my previous life.

    i have been off work for about 3 months now trying to come to terms with stuff but its not easy, trying to act normal to those around me.

    am i depressed? yes am i suicidal? yes

    but 3 months on i am still here, fighting with the help of sf, taking one step at a time and seeing what comes next thats outside of the plan.
    its not easy, it hurts but i want to give it a go.

    you are not alone in this hun and never will be.
    reach out to those who will listen
    take one day at a time and when you hurt then share that pain.

    take care and be safe

  3. Hazibell

    Hazibell Well-Known Member

    Hey Tink! I remember you the first time i was here! Im really sorry to hear that you feel like this! Im sure there are things that do mean a lot to you just as you mean a lot to a lot of people im sure, i really hope you stay around and feel better soon
  4. alwaysincrisis

    alwaysincrisis Well-Known Member

    Hi tinker,

    It's awful when the world percieves you as successful when inside you're dying isn't it? I've a full time job, nice flat, great family etc but it doesn't mean a thing when you aren't able to enjoy it. And you hit the nail on the head when you say you have nothing truly 'valuable' in your life. I feel like that too.

    Thinking of you and hope you are able to get back to work as soon as possible......

  5. Abacus21

    Abacus21 Staff Alumni

    Hey Debs

    Just wanted to give ya a hug ... :hug:
    Am here if you want to talk :)

    Take care and stay safe as best you can..

  6. TinkerLoop

    TinkerLoop Well-Known Member

    Hey guys i know im long replying but no internet at home.

    I was signed off work after a suicidal episode i dont go back until thurs and thats if my doc agrees to that on wed.

    i cant seem to get myself through the day unless i feel painn they whole day. Everything was fine i dunno how things can turn on me so quick. My friend at work sed i was withdrawn and weight has been dropping off me i didnt see this till i got on the scales myself. I can sleep the whole day out im so depressed anyone who this just aint me.

    i've written my will already. I cant get my head around any of this its like im numb and its scaring me i burn and nothing hurts me enough i just wanna keep doing more it should hurt a whole lot but it doesnt not anywhere near enough as i feel it should...

    i really dunno what im doing anymore and i apologise to anyone closes to me watching me do all this im trying but its like im combusting from the inside and i have no clue why.
    i dont wanna hurt anyone or upset them but yes im being selfish im harming to pull me through.

    trust i wont go to far the ive been up the hospital already.

  7. thedeafmusician

    thedeafmusician Staff Alumni

    Debzy :hug:

    Not really sure what to say.... just want to let you know that I'm thinking of you..

  8. TinkerLoop

    TinkerLoop Well-Known Member

    thanks for caring deaf i finally got my internet access up and running yay
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