Hello. I found this page while researching suicide...again. I lost my husband suddenly 3 years ago. Since then my life has become an uphill and endless climb out of depression. I'm on meds and I have good days but then I go through weeks of bad days. I met someone almost 2 years ago and we dated for a little over a year. He lied, cheated etc and it ended. I was completely heartbroken. Recently I started going out with someone I had known for a while. Unfortunately I think the timing was wrong as he just ended a long term relationship. I was so happy, until he abruptly ended it causing me so much pain. He and I are both recovering alcoholics and he was questioning his sobriety. He's back to meetings and just wants to work on himself right now. Which I can understand (sort of). I know life is full of ups and downs. But the downs have taken me so far down that at times I just want to be done with it. I have talked to a therapist many times. It doesn't help me. People say "but you have so much to live for..." It just doest help when you can't see it. I want to be pain free, with a hopeful heart and a reason to live. I want someone to care about me.