I have already posted about my depression and upcoming suicide in Antiquities Friends and the "do you have a suicide plan" post so I'm not going to repeat it here. Here I'll list the few positive things. I'm 32, very suprised i havent overdosed accidentally, died in an accident or caught HIV by now, basically very astonished i'm still alive after the 80 years of living i crammed into a decade. I live in a New England state, near the coast. That's all i feel comfortable saying right now on that. I'm in the health care field but am among the army of the unemployed. I'm also a musician (guitar for 18 years now, vocals since my voice changed (puberty)), and a writer, a rather good one if I do say so myself. I'm a longtime Deadhead (fan of the Grateful Dead) and am hippieish in appearance although not always in action. Life isn't all rainbows and flowers, sometimes it's knives, drugs and despair. I plan to post here until i either beat my depression or die. I plan to do one or the other by the end of the summer. In the meantime i hope you all can help me, and in turn, I can help you. You can tell a lot about a man by the three people he admires most, and mine are Hunter S. Thompson, Jerry Garcia, and Prince Gauthama Siddhartha (Buddha). That's it for now.