name is marianne. in a lousy marriage and suffer from depression and irritable bowel syndrome, which is quite painful. son who is on the autistic spectrum buy highly functional in college but has very little emotions. daughter who is great but has moved to nyc 1-1/2 years ago and is too suffering some emotional upset. husband out of work now and is totally useless when dealing with my depression. 99% of the time he makes me feel worse, blames things on me and calls depression BS as well as my physical ailment of IBS- says it is all BS. Terrible provider and passive aggressive. Not a nice person in any sense of the word. sad that I have a husband here and a son and I have to resort to a forum to get help and feel safe. married 28 years. been in hospital 3 times since dec. of 2010. Once for a pulmonary embolism and again for the same and the other was for a suicide attempt which obviously failed. Have not recovered fullly yet from these things. am 57 yo and so so tired. had an emotionally abusive mother but wonderful dad. horrible brother, only other sibling who does not even speak to me. tried and tried to make a good life for my family but my husband was either getting drunk or knocking up girls. 2 out of wedlock kids from before our marriage but still hurt emotionally and financially. always did my best to help everyone and no matter what I did, it wasn't enough for him. only thing from keeping me from ending my life is my daughter who would never get over it. hate my life and now am too ill mentally and physically to do anything about it. feel trapped and so so sad. much more to tell but this should me enough for anyone to get the idea as to why I am here.