Hi, let's hope I'm doing this right, I sort of skimmed the instructions as hard to read through tears. I'm about to turn 35, have been unemployed for 2 years. Have been looking for my pupose/career/job/goal for years. I get these lovely cycles of trying, giving up, getting depressed, starting over again. Every time I try to determine whether I have depression, I look online and see that it's diagnosed as 'being upset for no reason.' Well, it's not no reason - not having work or a career or a purpose in life sucks, so there my reason, so I must not be diagnostically "depressed." Despite sitting here in bed midday and having done nothing but cry for 3 hours, I must not be "depressed." Have dealt with abusive father, who is not in my life. Both parents never had careers. Have nice and supportive husband who is in the next room. He has no idea that I feel this way, and wouldn't have any idea how to help. Have therapist who is currently on vacation. Has never gotten this bad before. Or at least not recently. Don't want to off myself, but if I could choose to opt-out of life right now without hurting others, I would.