Hi there

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by jupiter202, Mar 28, 2007.

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  1. jupiter202

    jupiter202 Well-Known Member

    Hey, just wanted to introduce myself. Not comfortable with leaving my name just yet.

    My best friend killed himself last April after a fight we had. I have been completely devestated by this, obviously....Lately I have been shutting it out as much as possible because I feel so guilty. I also feel like no one wants to hear it anymore....like, I had my time to grieve....and I should be "over it" by now. I know none of my friends would ever say that to me...I guess its my own insecurity/guilt/whatever.

    I just miss him more than anything in the world....it hurts really really bad.
  2. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Hi Jupiter, welcome to SF.

    I am so sorry to hear about your friend, that must be awful for you.

    It is important that you realise that it was not your fault, as he was in control of his actions.

    There is no time limit for grief, there is no 'right' way to grieve, and you need to take your time with it.

    It sounds like you are so desperate and things are becoming hard for you. Have you been to the doctors? They can do a lot to help you, like meds and/or therapy. You might also find that something like bereavement counselling might help you with this massive loss too.

    Have you tried things like writing him letters? or poems? Things like that? It might help you to communicate with him, and release what you are feeling.

    If you ever need to talk feel free to PM me

    Hang in there and I hope SF can provide you with the support you need.

    Take care
  3. jupiter202

    jupiter202 Well-Known Member

    Thank you.

    Right after it happened, I talked to a therapist....once...never went back.
    I thought I was doing ok but now that the "anniversary" is coming up (and his bday) Im just so so sad.

    But thank you for the welcome....I hope talking here helps a little.
  4. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    It's natural you are sad honey. He was your mate and you are missing him like crazy.

    Maybe give therapy another thought. It can take a while to find the right therapist, and/or the right therapy in itself.

    Maybe you might like to tell us about your friend? Also, the loved and lost forum might be a place that might help you too, as well as the other forums of course.

    Take care of yourself
  5. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    First I would like to welcome you to the forum jupiter202. I am sorry to hear about what happened with your friend. Often when a friend suicides we carry a burden of guilt with us for a long time. I am sure these feelings are heightened because of your arguement. Please remember that his choice was not your fault. We are responsible for our own lives. Yes, we are involved in the lives of our family and friends, but the choice of suicide lies with the individual. It is understandable that with the anniversary and birthday approaching, the sadness surfaces again. You may still need to process things and grieve for your loss. Grieving has several stages and there is no set time when one moves from one stage to the other. I am glad you chose to share your thoughts and feelings with us. As Scum mentioned, maybe you would like to write about your friend in the loved and lost forum. You can share memories with us while bringing those memories to the surface for youself. Remembering good things can help in the healing process. You are in my thoughts. :hug:
  6. Marshmallow

    Marshmallow Staff Alumni

    Welcome to SF :hug:
  7. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    Welcome to Suicide Forum, hope it gives you the support and friendship you need. :hug:
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