Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by fee, Aug 11, 2009.

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  1. fee

    fee Member

    I don't know exactly what to write here. I am in need of some advice, sorry if this is long and rambling. You might know Laura (Triggs here). She's my cousin's neice (though we are quite close so we say we're cousins, it's easier), and she has been going through a lot recently. I have read a few of her posts, including the most recent about her wish to commit suicide (which she has not followed through with, thankfully). I had hoped that she would stay here and continue to get help but she wants to close her account. I thought, if she stayed I would at least be able to monitor what she's thinking and possibly doing, as it seems I've been missing a lot of the things she's been doing to herself (I know that sounds a little like invading her privacy, but it's so I could help her if I knew she was going to try and hurt herself again). I think perhaps, because I have made an account (as I also need help for my own issues), she doesn't feel as though she can stay here, which is unfortunate for both herself and me. I was just wondering if anyone had any ideas about how I could get her to stay, or if not, then if someone knew her quite well then might they stay in contact with her so she gets a little help? Or, failing that, maybe some advice on how to take care of her. I only know a little of what she's going through. I've urged her to see her doctor about her depression and I am going with her to an appointment that has been made late this week. But from there, I don't know what else I can do. Please help :(
  2. ZombiePringle

    ZombiePringle Forum Buddy and Antiquities Friend

    For one you could make sure she knows that we all love her here. And we all care for her a lot. she has helped many of us out on numerous times and I know we would like to be here for her when she needs it. The best thing you could do with her is just listen and be supportive of her. make sure she knows you're there when she needs you. that will help her out a lot I'm sure.
  3. fee

    fee Member

    Thanku, it's good to know people care for her. We're still not entirely sure why she tried to do this, but I'm hoping she will be able to talk to me in future, or someone else in the family. We're all keeping an eye on here at the moment, and I'll let her know that people here care for her.
  4. pisces

    pisces New Member & Antiquities Friend

    I havnt been a member here long i joined because of my brother and i think one of the most important things is to have someone listen,
    i couldnt help my brother in the way i'd hoped, but i listened and let him say what ever he wanted without telling him how he should feel or what he should do and i'm thankful he allowed me to do that for him,sometimes it just helps by knowing someones in your corner hun just keep reminding her your in her corner ,x
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You are doing the right thing supporting her to get to a professional who can help her. Listening definetely and spending time with her don't let her be alone if possible. Hopefully the doctor will see what needs to be done to get triggs stable because she deserves to be well. She is so compassionate and caring she is greatly missed but she needs time now to heal herself. Thanks for letting us know she is alright and thanks for being such a good cousin to her.
  6. fee

    fee Member

    Thanku both for the replies :) I'll definitatley be trying my best to help her. I know she's been having difficulty talking about how she feels, but hopefully she'll feel able to soon. She's decided to go on leave from the forum, but she wishes everyone well.
  7. Godsdrummer

    Godsdrummer Guest

    Let her know, that if she feels like she needs to talk online in a forum setting again, there is another site she can go to. People there are just as caring as us. I know. I have been a member there as long as I have been a member here. Both sites have helped me tremondously.

    I will send you a pm with the link.
  8. Hazel

    Hazel SF & Antiquitie's Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi Fee, it's good that you are trying to help your cousin :smile:, I'm just wondering if you talked to her about joining Sf before you joined, or does she think you are checking up on her and is that why she wants to leave? Does she know that you have your own issues and needs that made you access Sf?

  9. fee

    fee Member

    Thanku Forpetessake :)

    Hazel, Laura asked me to come here and tell people not to worry. Once she'd told me about the site she said it might benefit me as well (she knows I have attempted before and am having a hard trouble being away from family and friends at the moment). I didn't think about how it would affect her if I joined up, but I did so, to tell people she was ok primarily. :( I tried to encourage her to stay online after I'd joined up but she said it was for the best that she be put on leave anyway. Apparently she's going to see how it goes without SF for a while. :) thanku
  10. Hazel

    Hazel SF & Antiquitie's Friend Staff Alumni

    Do you & Laura live together?
  11. fee

    fee Member

    Not usually, but I've been staying with her family for a few weeks because I have a job in London. My sister is here too. We're both trying our best to take care of her :)
  12. Hazel

    Hazel SF & Antiquitie's Friend Staff Alumni

    You will be good support for each other then. :smile:
  13. fee

    fee Member

    :) Thanku. She does try to take care of everyone around her before herself, but hopefully we can do as you say and support each other.
  14. __Rawr.Tigga

    __Rawr.Tigga Well-Known Member

    It's good you two can support each other :) Take care of her, and yourself :hug:

    Let her know we here care for her, and that she was a great part of this site that will be missed.

    Take care hun,
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