Discussion in 'Welcome' started by AliBlack, Sep 17, 2009.

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  1. AliBlack

    AliBlack Member

    Hi, I'm Ali, my partner left me 2 months ago after 18 years, I'm not coping well, I became so obsessed with/passionate about caring for injured wild birds that it took literally all my time up and he felt rejected.
    I've tried to show him what he meant to me but he said it was too late. We were so close and special together, I've lost the love of my life. He is keen to stay friends, he said we know each other inside and out, that he still loves me (as a friend) that I'm the person he'll never have to bullshit with. He said if any future partner of his can't cope with our friendship that he wouldn't be with them for long. That he will always need me, that I am special and important to him.
    It's like torture, the last few weeks we finally talked about all the problems but I'm not being given a chance to put things right. Some couples could rebuild from it, I feel angry that we can't, like I'm not worth it.
    he left twice before (before I started the bird care), cos we'd got into a rut, he moved out for a while but came back and we were stronger after that and he kept saying why did he ever leave, that he couldn't live without me and that he regretted leaving. He even said this year that he'd never leave me again and I'd say but we don't know that!
    What hurts even more is that a group of friends who I introduced him to no longer bother with me but they still see him, and one of them is someone he used to fancy last time we split up, I am terrified they will end up together, and I am so angry that she hasn't been there for me, she is selfish.
    I don't know how to get through this, I can't believe he has gone, I'm stuck in an endless nightmare.
    Thanks for reading.
  2. pisces

    pisces New Member & Antiquities Friend

    I just wanted to say hello and am so sorry to hear what has happened ,i cant even begin to imagine how you must be feeling because i've been married for nearly 29 yrs, i only hope that time is kind to you and things begin to pick up,hugs
  3. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    Hey Ali (from another Ali, LOL). I'm so sorry for what you're going through, and I hope you find help and support here.
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi Ali, welcome to the forum :)
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hey Ali i hope you meet someone who will care and be a partner in your interest and will not leave everytime he feels like it. You are worth so much more and deserve more
  6. yursomedicated

    yursomedicated Chat & Forum Buddy

    welcome to the forums.

    if you ever need anything, don't be afraid to contact me.
  7. Ordep

    Ordep Well-Known Member

    Hey Ali welcome. I feel your sorrow, I also love birds and think bird cares is a very noble job. If it was my girlfriend I'd be proud, not jealous so I really can't understand your bf's position...

    Hope things improve to you, if you ever need to talk I'll be here. Take care
  8. AliBlack

    AliBlack Member

    Thanks everyone. I will PM you Ordep, I saw your other message too about broken heart.
  9. LenaLunacy

    LenaLunacy Well-Known Member

    Welcome to the forums.
  10. necrodude

    necrodude Well-Known Member

    hey welcome :)
  11. mike25

    mike25 Well-Known Member

  12. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    :welcome: to the forums Ali. Endings of relationships can be so difficult. It is like the death of someone you love, only you are faced with knowing they are still there but not accessible to you. I hope you are able to heal enough that you can maintain a friendship. This may take a great deal of time and I hope he can understand that. :hug:
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