Hi everyone. Suicide has touched me personally in 2008 when I lost my little brother in law. My only little sibling, I adored him and thought W'ed grow old together. Two days after he passed away, we lost our house and everything in it to flood. Two years before all this I had to terminate my first pregnancy. I am a member of passboards support forum. The house is no big deal but the other 2 things cause me and my marriage a great deal of strain. I have about 2 friends, and we don't talk about anything like that.. I find it difficult. To have an outlet for this pain. As long as my parents and brothers are alive though I will not succombe to suicide myself because I cannot put them thru that. But at the same time these very people have no idea what I'm going thru so I have no support. I have an intense desire to vanish from this earth most days, but I will be strong and hold it all in. I hope this board helps and I can help others too. Peace.