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I'm sorry to hear you're going through so much. :hugtackles: With caring....Alex
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Thank you all for the truely kind words. I have been seeing a physiotherapist since I was 13-14 but they are going to be reviewing how much progress i'm making and if I still need to see them - whether that be if they think they can't help me anymore or if I don't need to see them anymore.
I guess the suicidal thoughts got worse when I was admitted to an inpatient treatment centre for my eating disorder for 6 months (January to June of this year). I also had to sit my exams there which now that I think about it did through me deeper into my depression because all I could think about was that I wouldn't/couldn't do as well on them than if I had been in school.
And when I got to come home for good all I could think about was that even though I may have put on weight none of my thoughts had gone away which somehow in my head makes me a failure. And now it seems as through all I have been thinking/imagining about is commiting suicide. I desperatly want to tell my family/therapist but I have never been the type of person who shows people when when i'm upset, I guess I have always been the person other people come to for help.
I guess the suicidal thoughts got worse when I was admitted to an inpatient treatment centre for my eating disorder for 6 months (January to June of this year). I also had to sit my exams there which now that I think about it did through me deeper into my depression because all I could think about was that I wouldn't/couldn't do as well on them than if I had been in school.
And when I got to come home for good all I could think about was that even though I may have put on weight none of my thoughts had gone away which somehow in my head makes me a failure. And now it seems as through all I have been thinking/imagining about is commiting suicide. I desperatly want to tell my family/therapist but I have never been the type of person who shows people when when i'm upset, I guess I have always been the person other people come to for help.
Hi Chloe,
Your not a failure.. You just have some problems..I've been suicidal for 41 years.. Not all at the same time.. When I use to get high they went away for some years.. Now for the lkast 20 years they are back because I quit smoking pot.. What I do is face them everymorning and tell myself no yu won;t have me..It works most of the time..Positive self talk works.. You just need to beleive it..PM me if yiu want to talk.. Take care..
Your not a failure.. You just have some problems..I've been suicidal for 41 years.. Not all at the same time.. When I use to get high they went away for some years.. Now for the lkast 20 years they are back because I quit smoking pot.. What I do is face them everymorning and tell myself no yu won;t have me..It works most of the time..Positive self talk works.. You just need to beleive it..PM me if yiu want to talk.. Take care..
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