Ho boy, nothing makes a person feel better than parents arguing

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by eagles_fan, Nov 14, 2011.

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  1. eagles_fan

    eagles_fan Well-Known Member

    So my mom and my aunt apparently don't know each other and may even kind of dislike each other. I don't want to be a douche to anyone over this, but...I don't know.

    It's kind of heart breaking, to be honest. I thought my mom had friends, too, but in reality, she doesn't have anyone except her closest relatives and my dad. I don't want to grow up to be just like her, but I'm fairly certain that I will. I barely have any friends and twenty years from now, I'll be the same. I feel like such a loser.

    I really suck at making and keeping friends. I guess I'm just like my mom in that way.
     
  2. Mr Stewart

    Mr Stewart Well-Known Member

    I know it's a tempting thought to look at your parents and think that you'll inevitably end up just like them. Please try to resist that. I know from personal experience that it doesn't help anything, it will always make you feel worse. You are your own person. If you notice that you are headed down a path that resembles the troubles your parents have, you can make changes in your life to avoid that outcome. You can.
     
  3. eagles_fan

    eagles_fan Well-Known Member

    I haven't the faintest clue of how to keep friends.
    It's sad, but true. I've no one.
     
  4. Mr Stewart

    Mr Stewart Well-Known Member

    I suppose I should admit, here, that I am a recluse, so woefully unqualified to comment on the getting and keeping of friends or relationships. :eek:hmy:

    But! I do know for certain that you are not your mother. You are you. If there is something about yourself that you don't like, it is possible to change it, although it may not be easy to do so. The thing to do is not back down to the idea that certain outcomes are inevitable and that you are powerless to do anything about it. That road leads direct to despair. This is I know.
     
  5. eagles_fan

    eagles_fan Well-Known Member

    I believe that people choose to live however they wish. Sometimes I'm comfortable being lonely, sometimes now.

    Thank you so much for those words. My nature is mostly independent of my parents. I don't want to have almost no one in my life, but I've been so terrible at talking to people and chilling, that I almost fear it's too late. I do believe that I can change however.

    I just had yet another somewhat emotional outburst caused by my loosened grip on my emotions, as well as my fantasies. I haven't done that in a while and I'm a little ashamed. It was rather minor though so that's good.
     
  6. Mr Stewart

    Mr Stewart Well-Known Member

  7. lachrymose27

    lachrymose27 Well-Known Member

    Lol yeah i grew up ina house where mum and dad constantly argued and not only does that take a toll on how the kids develop, mum was hospitalized for high blood pressure, and i got to witness mum striking dad with a metal pole when i was like six or younger.they been divorced for a long time but who ends up fucked up? Me lol
     
  8. eagles_fan

    eagles_fan Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry. I'm really quite sorry. Just overhearing my mom and my dad's argument took a little toll on me, and I'm 18. I imagine growing up in an abusive environment like that would make me much worse.

    I really am sorry. :hug::hug:
     
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