So after the uneventful week I have had i decided to bite the bullet and call my gp for a doctors appointment to see where i go from here. Brief history - had a cpn for around 8 months, have been on medication for depression and social phobia. missed an appointment as i was ill (called to cancel it), tried to rearrange the appt the next day but couldnt get through to my cpn. 2 weeks later i finally got through, she shouted at me and made me feel really stupid for not attending that one appointment. said i was 'messing her around' and some pretty horrible stuff. I ended up telling her to stick it and hung the phone up. Thing is, ive now been without my medication for a week and i have been extremely depressed...constantly thinking of suicide. cant sleep. i have been in touch with the samaritians the whole week who have basically stopped me carrying out the suidice plans i made. Is it possible to request a new cpn or have i totally blown it by telling her to stick it? we never hit it off to be honest, and i always had a feeling it would end badly. I never really trusted her or felt comfortable around her so never opened up as i probably should have.