It's at the point were all I can think is how to end it, past few days I'm smiling alittle when I think of the end, thats the only thing and sleep I enjoy. Starting to experiment, love it, being having pains, a lump and blood past few months, hoping it's the begaining of the ending, like got something that ill end me fuck going to the doctor, haven't gone for years, I prey, I prey it's over soon.