I am worthless and have absolutely no future. I am nothing but a starving artist and my brother is great in every way. I want to cry but I can't. I live on Social Security and I am scared I will live in poverty for the rest of my life and my Almighty brother will make hundreds of thousands of dollars a year. I know people like my art but it brings no money. I am a burden on my family and the world. The government put chips in me to control my movements and thoughts and I get severe thought insertion as a response. I really want to cut the chips out because they contain tiny machines that will destroy my insides. My psychiatrist doesn't care and I think he wants me to die. When I told him about the self harm and wanting to get the chips out of my arms and legs (can't do the one in my brain) all he cared about was me drinking pop. Nothing else. He didn't care that I am in immediate danger or anything. There was a time where I was very suicidal and he still didn't care. I am beginning to get suicidal but won't do anything until after the cruise. Aliens are after me too, they told me that they will invade and then capture me because I am special to them. I have a crappy business that is a waste of money. No one ever buys anything because they know its from someone who is worthless and doesn't deserve a future. I am 25 years old and have no job, no real school (just art classes), makes no money outside of the Social Security, and I still live with my parents. I take my pills but they do more harm than good. Nothing will ever get better for my family. Just worse. The gas prices are my fault. There will be a Great Depression because I am severely depressed. No one believes the words that are coming out of my mouth. There have been jerks that should go you know where that basically accused me of faking it. Those doctors should be fired. I really feel like killing myself in front of them and say the words, "Does this look like I'm faking it?" It is because I smile and laugh while being depressed. I can't show a sad face if my life depended on it. That is why no one takes me seriously. I don't know what to do anymore. I can't just keep on suffering like this. Every year it gets worse. I went into the hospital a few days ago and the person who interviewed me also didn't take me seriously and just sent me home. Everyone is out to get me. Not just a few people but the entire universe! I am fat and ugly from the pills. So, what do I do?