I need someone to help me, to take these thoughts away from my mind i cant cope with life, i dont want to exist. I want to scream for help but i cant, im lost lonely and so confused. i dont know what reality is anymore im just drifting through life. I dont want to end up dead but on the other hand i so desprately dont want to be here, i want to leave to go far away from all of this. Im sick of pertending im happy when in side im dying yet no one notices. i cant tell my family they are ruining my life i dont want to hurt any one. im tired of talking it doesnt help. i sit alone in my room wishing for death yet i cant do it. i dont want to hurt my mum id destroy her but instead im destroying myself. Theres no one out there to help me, i push people away i dont want to speak to anyone but im so alone i dont know what im doing anymore i just want all this to end but it wont. Is this my life now coming on here and telling strangers i want to die. im tired of this i just want to be fuckin normal what ever that maybe. Everyone has a reason to be here but i dont, im not clever creative funny im a nothing just a empty person so why am i here. im a fuckin failure and everyone knows it. i hate myself i just want peace and i cant find it.