Hopelessness and cant stop thinking about doing it...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by DontGiveUpOnMe, Feb 17, 2012.

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    Been hurting since age 5....so many times I was *this* close to telling someone
    *this* close to having someone believe me
    *this* close to thinking I would be unconditionally loved..

    with so many *this close* moments and so many fails....you end up at this point where Im at now...
    where u are tired of trying...u dont know what day it is..
    I started walking in the middle of the street today...a car was coming and I felt no fear...but it got slower and I had to move to the side.

    thinking of what it would be like...
    Feeling like it didnt really matter.
    and in a strange way happy.
    How can I get these thoughts out of my head
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 17, 2012
  2. AsphyxiateOnMisery

    AsphyxiateOnMisery Well-Known Member

    I've been "this" close to doing just about everything in my entire life...and, at the end of the day, I've actually done absolutely nothing. I know how much it sucks. I'm sorry that I can't really provide much advice for you besides the standard "Have you tried therapy?", but just thought maybe someone saying "I know how you feel." might make you feel a little less alone, if not better.
  3. Truth is I dont think ide actually do it...but I think about it so much and i get so tired and i start thinking and thinking..and the fear of doing it isnt as present... :\
    I see a T but I wudnt tell her this. i dont trust enough yet...and i dont want to get locked up..
    getting locked up.....That would finish me.
  4. AsphyxiateOnMisery

    AsphyxiateOnMisery Well-Known Member

    That's good though that you don't think you'd actually do it. That means you have enough reasons to stick around. Try to cling to those reasons as much as you can.
  5. meme333

    meme333 Well-Known Member

    Hi there
    I haven't been on here for awhile but back today with my own blah feelings.
    I wanted to respond to you because I too have been hurting for what seems like forever.
    Reality is that as much as we speak about going away, we would do it if it's what we truly wanted.
    We want the happiness right?
    I wish there was something I could say to make things feel better.
    I'm glad you are here because it is one place you don't have to edit your words unless they are detailed plans of harm.

    If you want to share or chat about anything feel free to message me.
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