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hospital visit

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by pascal, Jul 1, 2009.

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  1. pascal

    pascal New Member

    hi everyone,

    as u can see by this post, im still alive.
    just after my last post i visited my psyciatrist and we talked about how i felt.
    then she told me she had to make a phonecall, next thing i know 2 ambulance guys walk in and strap me into a straitjacket, load me into the ambulance and take me to the hospital, wich has a psyciatrist appartment next to it, where they kept me untill now, im just one day off and got to go back tomorrow. so last 2 weeks have been realy weird. ive seen ALOT of docters and therapists and what not. but to be honest, the second i stepped foot into my home again today, i feel like killing myself again.
    and the fact that people tried to help me in many ways and FAILED, stacks up with the confidence i have in ever feeling good again.
    it seems they cant help me in the situation im in, and i cant help myself. i have to go back tomorrow but i dont think im gonna do that.
    i have to say im very disapointed in myself, and also the psyciatric help available for people in need of it. it seems all the docters are just guessing.
    just like myself.
    the weird thing is, the time ive spend there in the hospital, i felt safe, and among people with psychoses and stuff, i didnt feel the pressure of life as i normaly do. just too bad they send you back home again i guess. back to the old situation....nothing changed
  2. Asajj

    Asajj Active Member

    I can totally relate to this. I actually hate that I'm not in hospital any more. I am sorry for what happened to you though and I hope you find a way to regain some faith in the services available to you and in yourself, since you believe you can't help yourself as well.

    Good luck.
  3. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    Hi, Pascal. I'm glad you're still with us :hug: !

    After having lots of people around you at the hospital, coming home would feel strange and a bit challenging. I really hope you don't let the "I'm back-home blues" get you too down.

    The doctors and therapists at the hospital set up your appointment for tomorrow to support you and get you the right sort of help on an out-patient basis. I hope you go to the appointment. Remember a lot of things contributed to your pain and some things may be ongoing health issues, so it will take more than just a couple of weeks to resolve all of them. Please give yourself a chance and keep posting to us.

    I'm glad to see you posting now that you're home.

  4. LenaLunacy

    LenaLunacy Well-Known Member

    I'm glad your still with us :hug:
    Sorry to hear that the hospital stay wasn't quite as you expected it, and that you don't feel it helped. But hospitals have limited space and resources and can only keep a person for so long before, no matter what, they must release them. It's not a prison. You have to be willing to help yourself, to accept that you can get help and make your life better before a hospital stay will work for you.
    There are many other resources yet for you to try, look into outpatient therapy, group therapy and other similar ideas.
    Good luck :hug:
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