How Are You Feeling Right Now?

AvidFan

Retired Cat Staff
SF Supporter
Half and half, pretty anxious but not as bad as yesterday. Trying to drum up the courage to request a tradesperson to visit to sort one of the house issues. I really don't know why these things make me feel so bloody anxious. I think it's the worry about how much it's going to cost! Also I just feel useless, like I don't know anything and they could spin any story to get money out of me. There was a problem with water appearing at the back of the house ages ago and I asked 4 different people who gave me 4 different versions of what the problem was, from underground water pipes to the neighbour's extension roof. One builder was really adamant the water was coming from next door (resulting with arguments with neighbour), another said that was impossible. In the end the water disappeared but never had any idea what it was - how was I supposed to know when "professionals" couldn't agree on any aspect of it?! The neighbour smashed his bathroom up in response to my demands to stop the water, but it turned out it was nothing to do with that as it continued a while after that! I really struggle dealing with all this on my own. Other things I need to do as well like weeding the garden, and of course this is all piled on top of work that I need to keep doing. I suppose AAA - action alleviates anxiety, but I'm not sure how I'll feel once I send that message with fingers crossed I get a decent tradesperson out!
 

AvidFan

Retired Cat Staff
SF Supporter
Message sent. I could do with some time off work, I might just have to forget work while I get this sorted (my front windows are badly in need of either replacing or re-caulking, have had water come in when the wind blows rain hard towards the house so there's clearly a problem and the seal looks perished all the way round. Anxious as to both the time and money costs getting this sorted will have, I was in a very different financial state when I bought the house, never expected it would need all these things doing eventually, I just wanted to move out of my parents' house. But if I don't act it could get a lot worse. 😒 Appreciate that people who rent would likely love to have this problem, I'm just terrified that there's going to be more and more need doing and I will just collapse financially like I nearly did in 2022. One thing at a time, hey!
 
So happy for you & to hear this news @PrincessPure - How wonderful! Have a good time. Enjoy yourself. Come back ready to fire the afterburners (back) up & study some more anatomy (j/k) ;^) Take care! -mrb~
This time im going for the last piece of anatomy, neuroanatomy! I will have to study it when im at my parents' house. I also heard i need to score high on this if i want to specialize in psychiatry which im kind of thinking of as one of my options.
 

MisterBGone

Deljuxe Edition.. ✅
SF Supporter
This time im going for the last piece of anatomy, neuroanatomy! I will have to study it when im at my parents' house. I also heard i need to score high on this if i want to specialize in psychiatry which im kind of thinking of as one of my options.
Sounds cool! is that like cranial nerves, and such? Hopefully you can still get some time to relax & play. Go to the beach and see friends~ / I don't know about there, or wherever it is you plan on intending to practice (assuming you've made up your mind, already) . . . but over here there has been a shortage of them ever since forever. Like when I was seeing them. 15 years (+) ago~*> So, you know: the world needs good psychiatrists, and those that truly understand the patient and their unique suffering & challenges/complications: from the inside. As opposed to, only what you study are taught, and learn as a clinician. In my opinion! ;)
 

AvidFan

Retired Cat Staff
SF Supporter
Very shaky and tired. I decided I would do the front and back gardens and start getting on top of things. I did a bit about a month ago but have been procrastinating as I always feel once you start something it's hard to finish and leads to more work. And seems I was right. I did the front garden and that was OK. Then I started weeding the back garden flowerbed which was full of "weeds". Turns out a good few of them are trees trying to get going so I've been pulling up all the baby ones and having to saw the lower branches off the godamn trees. I've applied weedkiller but probably need something stronger to kill them off. Have to as they're growing near the wall. Meanwhile found another issue with the outside wall which is terrifying me right now, but mainly I'm paying attention to the dollop of soil that went into my eye and the horrible back spasms I've been having from all the bending down. I could barely walk at one point , the muscles aren't used to all this. I cleaned out my eye with water and will hope for the best. I feel no sense of achievement but will try to keep on top of this crap from now on, removing weeds as they appear instead of leaving them to get deep rooted. I have thought of selling the house and buying a small flat without a garden, but that is the last process I want to go through right now! Sigh. Life is a constant battle of survival, one way or another. In the meantime the ants are ignoring all baits, didn't see a single ant in the garden because they're all in the house 😢
 

AvidFan

Retired Cat Staff
SF Supporter
Feeling Ok-ish. Not sure why, nothing has changed, I'm just trying to make my late evening a worry free time. There are things I need to do for sure, perhaps more problems lurking, but worrying about them isn't going to solve them. I'll take how I feel for now, it's better than I felt yesterday. I may feel better or worse tomorrow 🤷‍♂️
 

JMG

(Away Fri.Jul.12-Mon.Jul.15th) 😉🥰😊
Definitely a bit ignored in some ways, but whatever, that's just fine. Luckily, I am also feeling grateful for all the good things in my life - some of the kind/responsive members here on SF, my mom, cat, sis, friend, nature, animals, art, games, yummy food, the net and lots of other good things too :)
Just kinda doing all I can to stay calm and positive about things right now, because it is WAY TOO HOT to get stressed, mad, upset or anything else negative, about anything at all.
 

AvidFan

Retired Cat Staff
SF Supporter
Awake and aching, woke at 3.52am but managed to get back to sleep until 8am or so. My hand is hurting from pulling weeds and the back spasms have turned into some lower back pain. Hopefully it will wear off, used muscles I haven't used in years yesterday. At least that task is done for now, though I need to get the overgrown lawn sorted, might have to get someone in for that but getting people in seems to be an art that requires magical skills. No response to my contact about the windows so I'll have to try again, it's horrible as you never know who to trust with the amount of "cowboys" or rogue tradesmen around. Trying to think of one thing at a time but it's hard. Also need to make sure I stay well as if I worry myself sick, and can't work, I really will be buggered, but am feeling physical anxiety symptoms that aren't going away even when I feel mentally relaxed. At least the aches and pains are distracting my attention from that!
 
I’m really struggling. I just wanted to talk to other humans who might “get it”. I feel like a useless person. I am weak and can’t cope and let everyone down. I don’t know if I want to die so much as not exist. Everything feels too hard. And I’m so constantly tired. I feel trapped in a cycle that I can’t get out of. More to it than this but… I don’t even know what this place is for really. I’m just yelling into the void hoping someone might understand
 

AvidFan

Retired Cat Staff
SF Supporter
I’m really struggling. I just wanted to talk to other humans who might “get it”. I feel like a useless person. I am weak and can’t cope and let everyone down. I don’t know if I want to die so much as not exist. Everything feels too hard. And I’m so constantly tired. I feel trapped in a cycle that I can’t get out of. More to it than this but… I don’t even know what this place is for really. I’m just yelling into the void hoping someone might understand
Sorry to hear what you're going through, I think many/most of us here can relate. Not sure where you are but there are quite a few north American people on here and it's still early there so the forum can be a bit quiet some times of the day. Stick around though and you will find people who are supportive and know what it feels like. I can certainly understand that feeling of being trapped and am sorry that you are going through that feeling, it sounds like you have been through a lot.
 

Angie

Safety & Support
SF Author
SF Supporter
I’m really struggling. I just wanted to talk to other humans who might “get it”. I feel like a useless person. I am weak and can’t cope and let everyone down. I don’t know if I want to die so much as not exist. Everything feels too hard. And I’m so constantly tired. I feel trapped in a cycle that I can’t get out of. More to it than this but… I don’t even know what this place is for really. I’m just yelling into the void hoping someone might understand
I hear you. Sometimes it is all about stopping the pain and misery we have in our lives. I get it about the cycle.

This place is for human contact (no chat bots here!). People come by and leave messages about their thoughts and feelings and other people respond. :)

Feel free to talk about whatever is on your mind!
 

Angie

Safety & Support
SF Author
SF Supporter
My mind has that awful scrabbling around on ice feeling. Like it can't take hold and is all over the place. Its 5 am here in Texas and I've been awake since 1:30 am. My sleep sucks atm.

I over ate yesterday, and am feeling guilty about that. It was nothing but laziness in not preparing the right foods. I know better. Also, why are all recipes, even the "healthy" ones made for 6 to 8 servings? I don't NEED 6-8 servings of ANYTHING!

There are a couple of situations among my friends here at the apartments that have me upset. They don't have to do with me directly, but injustice among people distresses me. Why are people so unkind to one another?

Financially I am in a bind because of some incredibly unwise shopping therapy this last Spring. I have a budget now and I am trying to stick to it, but I struggle to do that.

TLDR, sorry
 

Angie

Safety & Support
SF Author
SF Supporter
Awake and aching, woke at 3.52am but managed to get back to sleep until 8am or so. My hand is hurting from pulling weeds and the back spasms have turned into some lower back pain. Hopefully it will wear off, used muscles I haven't used in years yesterday. At least that task is done for now, though I need to get the overgrown lawn sorted, might have to get someone in for that but getting people in seems to be an art that requires magical skills. No response to my contact about the windows so I'll have to try again, it's horrible as you never know who to trust with the amount of "cowboys" or rogue tradesmen around. Trying to think of one thing at a time but it's hard. Also need to make sure I stay well as if I worry myself sick, and can't work, I really will be buggered, but am feeling physical anxiety symptoms that aren't going away even when I feel mentally relaxed. At least the aches and pains are distracting my attention from that!
You DO have a lot on your plate right now!

You are right about anxiety making us unwell. I deal with anxiety all the time, and, as you say, even when my mind doesn't FEEL anxious, my body says otherwise!

I hope your anxiety lessens and some of the worries resole themselves *hug
 

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