How are you?

Discussion in 'Poet's Corner' started by Freya, Aug 23, 2012.

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  1. Freya

    Freya Loves SF Staff Member ADMIN SF Author

    How Are You?

    How am I?
    I am raw –
    I am stripped to the soul, bleeding,
    Naked and screaming,
    I am exposed and I’m yielding to the horrors in my mind.
    I am breathing in fumes
    From the hate that surrounds me,
    Consumes me and hounds me,
    I am running from a past I cannot leave behind.
    I am trying to swim through a tide of self-loathing
    And I feel like I’m sinking,
    The air pocket shrinking
    As I strike for a shore I can no longer find.

    How am I
    I am broken –
    I am torn and I’m shattered
    My remnants are jagged
    I am splinters of the person I once used to be
    I am picking up pieces I have no hopes of mending
    The pain is unending
    And if there’s a way, it’s a path I can’t see.
    I am locked in the dark behind bars of revulsion
    There are no lights or candles,
    The doors have no handles,
    And I know there’s no way to ever be free.

    How am I?
    I’m alone –
    I am scared and I’m running
    The ending is coming
    I am angry
    I am fighting
    I am kicking and biting
    Clawing and flailing
    The life in me failing
    I’m flagging

    I’m losing

    I’m choosing

    I’m done.

    How am I?
    I’m good thanks – how are you?
  2. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    Your poem is beautiful. I would like to discuss it and the way it made me think of you and how much I care for you , and how I would like to be able to take away your fears and pain - but that post would be simply too long.

    Let it simply be said - You are not , nor will you be alone in your struggles - people care - I care.

    Always available to you 24/7

  3. SmolderingIce

    SmolderingIce Well-Known Member

    I am in love with this poem. Every syllable works together to form a sort of beauty in rhythm.. Brilliant.
  4. Cariad_Bach

    Cariad_Bach Staff Alumni

    It is, unsurprisingly, really well written. It is easy to read and it bounces naturally. I often find that the poems I appreciate the most have no incidental words or sentences, and every element is not only essential but irreplaceable.

    After every line I had no idea what was coming next... but as soon as I read it I knew it couldn't have been anything else.

    I know this is old, written a few months ago, but I hope you no longer feel like this. Truly.
  5. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    The tale of the two lives many of us have to well stated...wish there was more congruity and that it was on the happier side
  6. CGMAngel

    CGMAngel SF Supporter

    Beautiful poem. The words perfectly encapsulate how so many of us struggle every day.

    And the ending? Perfect.
  7. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    Freya...Beautifully written poem. Rhymes that tie ideas together ("I'm sinking" and "air pocket shrinking"), great images (I love the "doors with no handles"!). I really like the way the pace gets tighter and faster and then the ending is that pulled in, "I'm good thanks - how are you?" The whole poem has such depth of feeling and overall impact!

    Freya, please know that if you need someone to hear you, you can call on me. :hug:
  8. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I hear you hun and i too feel that pain that fight hun You are fighting hun and i know you feel you are not winning but you are and like said hun You are NOT alone ok hugs
  9. Senada

    Senada Well-Known Member

    I have tears in my eyes.. This poem is beautiful, Freya.

    Many hugs from me to you
  10. Freya

    Freya Loves SF Staff Member ADMIN SF Author

    Wow - thank you all. I really appreciate your comments :) The poem is very personal - means a lot that it 'spoke' to people.
  11. guage

    guage Well-Known Member

    Yes indeed , yes indeed. I have to say that is a beautifully written poem. Lots of my own thoughts when I am asked that throughout the day. I probably won't remember the words , but I won't forget this poem was written, every time I get asked I will now think of this . And how it was so elegantly written. Thank you
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