how bad

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by ACRon, Jan 3, 2009.

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  1. ACRon

    ACRon Well-Known Member

    at the lowest ebb, how bad can it get when there is no way back. like, how thin can a person be spread before something goes wrong away. as in the avatar, all i see is rainclouds. i can get past that just fine, but there's no-one there beyond that. so im seeing these things as im a bad person, i know that, im a ghost, i use energy for bad things, when i have it, i dont use it (cant use it) for anything that helps the situation.

    its like a wound, that im attached to, thats outside of anything. its all im concerned about, its my priority, but its a priority that goes nowhere and helps nobody

    to the original point, its pretty sick, i am cursed. how bad can it get, at what point of self delusionment and utter helplessness does something spark in me to react? i have no reaction to it, why i really don know, i dont care wether i get better or not. its not 'just feeling sorry for myself' i really just dont care that im held together by specks of wet thoughts, i know im in danger, i know im struggling and i need to do something but theres no drive in me to go on. and thats genuinely who i seem to be. its really worrying because im always in a default mode, im vacant, i dont have the power of speech.

    so how bad can it get? i know im not alone and i know this has been manipulated, its a man made lifestyle. but im not complaining, im in this position for a reason
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 3, 2009
  2. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    I don't know you and i'm only making some presumptions, so correct me if i'm wrong. It might be that you have been in this state for a while now that you have forget all else. Also it sounds like you have lost alot of hope.
  3. crookxshanks

    crookxshanks Well-Known Member

    i am so sorry that you are feeling this way and that you feel like all the hope has drained away. although just like all clouds they do move on and im sure there has to be something in your life that can make these clouds move on. even if its just a small thing that gives you the energy to carry on. from reading your post its obvious there is something there but you just have to realise it
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