How can i be so dumb?

So im new to this. sigh. just hating myself right now. i can't imagine it ever getting better. so i'll feel this pain forever? i have a very bad sense of how to interact with others. either i freeze and dont say a word and get overlooked. or i stick my foot in my mouth and draw negative attention to myself. where is the middle ground? i just made a fool of myself at a work party. all my hard work is now meaningless because no one's going to like me anyway.
my depression has made me fail in career, in relationships, in everything. my life is now nothing. all i had was work. meanwhile, my sister is doing great- in career, in relationships, etc. so im just the disappointment to the family. I cant imagine getting up and dealing with the embarrassment at work. and then seeing my family over christmas. well, thanks for reading this. im not sure what can help. i hope tomorrow will be better and everyone won't hate me.

 

Well I can say that I can really relate to you and so can at least several others on this forum, I also am horrible socially, a COMPLETE social retard, inferior to everyone, can't interact because everyone is normal and I am not. I'm pretty sure I'll never make friends, get a soulmate, etc.
Sorry that didn't help but I can just say that there are people here that share your thoughts, feelings, experiences etc and can help you out. I'm sure you'll do better than me.

 

Gee i can relate to both of you. Like my cousins who are both about the same age as me, they were always overachievers, but now they've got good degrees and have carrers that just fell into their laps. me, im doing mediocre at school, my extra-cirricular fell apart this semester, socially i am dead and i recently lost my exercise routine. Smoking's going up too.

That was a good vent.

oh Christmas!!!! Good God i do not want this to happen. I don't even know if my family is helping me or pitying me. i think I'm getting a lot of pity recently from various locations. I hate it. If I can't be on a normal scale with anyone I would rather be alone, entirely, until i'm ready. Plans for a carreer or the future? No, they do not exist. So since I'm going to be away i hope to have time to figure things out. Different location will hopefully mean different thinking. But i really just want to be alone for a while.

Best advice I can give is to really take in what others are saying and analyze it, put yourself in their shoes vis-a-vie yourself and try to look at things from different angles. This may be extremely painful, but necessary.