How can I help my wife?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by obsidianwolf, Feb 28, 2015.

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  1. obsidianwolf

    obsidianwolf New Member

    Hi everyone, I'm Chris. I have been suicidal the majority of my life and I keep going every day. Some days are better than others but on the whole, these last few years have been easier.
    I come to you today asking if there's anything you could suggest I do to support my wife. She has been really unstable lately due to her body dysphoria. I'm always here trying to support her but last night things took a turn for the worse and I'm just lost. I don't know how I can help her anymore. She refuses to acknowledge therapy as a way to help. I've suggested exercise, changing her diet, even doing it with her but nothing can keep her motivated to make the change she needs.
    Last night she begged me to help her kill herself. I tried to call 911, as there's literally nothing else I know I can do anymore but she threatened to say that I hurt her and have me arrested if I tried. She is very manipulative in her nature and sadly, I know they'd believe her. So unfortunately I don't think I can even call any services who know how to handle this.
    I myself had issues with my body amongst other things and so I know how she's feeling. I know the hopelessness but nothing I say can reassure her that it can be better.
    I was hoping maybe someone here could give me some advice on any other angles I could take to help her. She deserves much more than this but I feel like I'm out of my depth.
     
  2. chellex79xx

    chellex79xx Member

    Coming on here in itself shows how much you must love and care for your wife . Sadly I think you alone cannot help your wife and it really is professional help she really does need . All you can do is be patient and supportive and speak to professionals yourself ....if even for your own health . Not one of us can be helped unless we are willing to seek and have help .
     
  3. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi Chris, you wife is very lucky to have you looking out for her. What is your relationship like with her family? Is there any one of them you can talk to about this? It's hard to be the only person supporting someone so sick so please give it some thought to maybe ask her to engage in counseling with her, counseling may do her the world of good. Has she seen a doctor?
     
  4. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    There is so much one can do for their loved one. If she refuses the help and accessing resources sometimes letting them fall to rock bottom to wake up and realize they need the help.

    Another angle is continue being postive and listening being patient during the rough patches and maybe removing mirrors and weight scale to reduce body image related issues. I'm not a professional but when I removed mirror I reduced my body image issues significantly
     
  5. deb22

    deb22 Well-Known Member

    Hi Chris, I cant add much help at all for your wife. You however must protect yourself in case of a "worst case scenario". It is important for you to go to the police and explain your situation so it will be on record for when you do have to call or god forbid if something were to happen without documentation you life could be ruined. Do this on a calmer day and explain the situation fully to the police so when you have no option but to call they will know what to expect if she does follow through on her threat. I hope things can get better for her, but doing your best is all you can do, I don't think it is possible to do better than your best so I wish you hope.
     
  6. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi Chris, welcome to the.forum. It's a difficult and I understand you are.suffering but all you can do is be supportive. I feel the situation is out of your hands as she needs to seek professional advice like the others say.

    I know it's hard for you as you don't like to see a loved one to suffer. Long-term.it will be good and you will have done nothing wrong as.you trying to save your wife from destroying herself. She may see as betrayal but you are only your best for her.

    I know it's not nice to hear but in your heart you know what is the.right.thing to do. Please keep posting as you deserve the support of this forum. Be safe yourself.
     
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