I just wish I knew what to do to stay safe. The more I care, the more I get hurt. If I could take a pill to rid myself of all emotions, I would likely do it. I don't care if living like a robot would be worse. I don't care that emotions are what makes us human. All that ever does is hurt me deeply. I am tired of being lied to, manipulated, called down, and treated like crap ever since I was a little kid. I'm just sick of it all. I want to numb myself and shut down and hide forever.