How can people be happy in this day and age?

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Amber, Apr 4, 2011.

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  1. Amber

    Amber Active Member

    Maybe I should say how can people be happy at all ever because there's so much ugly. animals abused, people abused, death all over...
    I don't know how to be happy anymore.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You see everythng dark you are not seeing the good in the world It outways the bad just you only hear about the bad because it sells more Take a good look and see how people come together in amongst disaster to help each other
    there is kindness in this world you are just not looking in the right places
     
  3. Amber

    Amber Active Member

    It's just hard. I wish I could be one of those people that could see the good. I used to be and I don't know where that went.
     
  4. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    maybe take a break from the news. it's basically the worst stuff that goes on there, because that is what sells

    for me, it's necessary to believe that there is karma, some kind of divine justice, so that everything will work out ok in the end

    I don't have to worry about fixing every problem that way, and I am able to try to make things a little better
     
  5. bluegrey

    bluegrey Antiquities Friend

    "If it bleeds it leads" is the mindset of the news business- sensationalism sells. Back in the good old days all of these terrible things were happening but there weren't twenty four hour news channels and Internet news headlines to keep droning these stories into our minds.

    It is probably clinical depression that is giving you selective attention to the unpleasant stories and side of human nature. Sometimes it feels like remaining in a state of worry and being preoccupied with the unpleasant events in the world will protect you from being caught off guard. I have generalized anxiety disorder and find myself falling into this trap which only perpetuates my anxiety and feeling I can never relax and again see good in the world.
     
  6. Amber

    Amber Active Member

    You're totally right. I was the editor of the school paper and we were taught that exact same catch phrase :)

    Also, I believe you are right when you mention clinical depression. I think it's forcing me to just see the bad in things. I'm going to try really hard to stick with some therapy and I'm hoping that it will help.

    Thanks all =]
     
  7. damage.case

    damage.case Well-Known Member

    I don't watch the news and stopped giving a shit about society.
     
  8. Last Post

    Last Post Member

    happiness is overrated. everyone;s so focused on being happy, do things that make you happy, its fine as long as you have a happy life. being happy without a good reason is insane. id rather be a decent/productive unhappy person than some airhead/waste of resource happy person
     
  9. solutions

    solutions Well-Known Member

    Fascinating. I've never seen someone pulled out of this subject so quickly.

    The news really isn't that depressing, since you're not a part of it. You're just watching a glamorized, censored version of what's going on. What is depressing is being a part of something as "ugly" as what you mention.

    Too bad for me, I was exposed to things I shouldn't have been exposed to, repeatedly, since I was a child, starting with domestic violence and somehow consistently escalating from there. I've witnessed car accidents by having the misfortune of driving behind them, and I learned later that people were killed.

    I've known girls who suffer and believe they deserve horrifying abuse. They're almost always clinically depressed, and it's easy to take advantage of that. That kind of thing doesn't make it in the news. But as much as I loved one particular girl, nothing I said could save her. She's just driven to ruin her life. The stories she's told me have been making me feel sick for years. She hit rock bottom when her abusive ex-boyfriend hit his head and went into a coma. She lost her fucking mind, talking about nothing except him for the months he was in the coma. She cried nonstop. I supported her through this, even though I knew the son of a bitch deserved it. She told me she promised him she'd kill herself if he died. She didn't, all she did was call me and sob into the phone. I knew another girl who was raped twice, the first time when she was 13, beaten on a regular basis by her ex-boyfriend, and lived in constant fear. She sought no treatment and told no authorities. I learned all this over the phone one night when she decided she needed someone to confide in.

    Happiness is being distracted enough from reality to be able to ignore it. So always make sure you have something on hand to take your mind off things.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 7, 2011
  10. peacelovingguy

    peacelovingguy Well-Known Member

    The world is mixture of the good, bad and ugly. For the main part, my understanding is that humanity rises above the laws of nature. Nature itself can be cruel and although people abusing animals is horrible - you have to bear in mind nature does not provide vets for sick animals.

    Take comfort in the fact that people show extraordinary kindness to animals, we will fix a broken wing, nature would see a broken wing as a free meal every time.

    You sound like a compassionate person and you need to be careful you don't suffer from fatigue by concentrating so much on the bad news.

    Good news is generally the stuff of day to day conversations. When you feel better and are more connected then you tend to support others in their happiness and whatever struggle they have. You can hear good news everyday on that small level local scale. It might seem 'boring' but take the time to ask how people are doing - you'll find people talk and you'll hear good news even if its a niece who has passed A levels or whatever qualifications.

    Part of the struggle in life is for us to maintain some joy. Hard I know with depression, but joy is not always a hand clapping joy ceremony in a church - your joy, or joys, are something you need to cherish.

    Educate yourself by all means and discover some of the truths which others might shirk away from. Eventually you will discover that there are forces for good and forces for evil. Even in the midst of mankind's most horrific endeavours, there too we find compassion, kindness, sacrifice and selflessness.

    Watching news makes us passive observers whose role is to soak up the misery. Maybe this grinds us down and makes us less sympathetic or less able to feel empathy. Set yourself goals that take you away from the wider world and its worries. The world will never change, but some people will. To help others change you have to change yourself first - but its easy if you start to make room in your life for joy. I'm more talking about doing something than falling in love.

    But, hey, knock yourself out if love does turn up.

    Make room for something sacred in your life. I'm not talking religion, because I don't want to exclude anyone from the very real need to have something sacred - some part of you that remains intact despite all the horrible things that may have happened to you.
     
  11. Lestat

    Lestat Guest

    “Be the change you want to see in the
    world.” its one of my fave quotes. I'm not saying it works... But I wish it did.
     
  12. peacelovingguy

    peacelovingguy Well-Known Member

    Be the change you want to see in the world.

    That is a brilliant saying.

    Thanks Lestat.

    I think it does work - just never thought about it.

    I mean I want the world to be a better place so I guess I have to be a better person.
     
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