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How do I approach girls? What should I avoid doing around girls?

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by A_New_Man, Dec 15, 2007.

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  1. A_New_Man

    A_New_Man Well-Known Member

    These are embarassing questions to ask, but...I never learned about this, so I have to ask.

    Okay, so...I see a girl and I think she's cute and I want to get to know her better.

    I'm pretty sure she'd think it was weird if I just walked up and started talking to her. I don't think anybody likes being bothered by strangers out of the blue. Also, she'd probably figure out what my motive is immediately, which would kill any chance of a warm reception.

    So what's an 'acceptable' way to approach a girl and start talking to her, then? What am I supposed to say to the girl once I've got her attention? What kinds of things would be unwelcome, and what kinds of things would be wise?

    (While you're at it, could you please tell me where I should go to meet girls? >_>; But even if I know where to meet girls, it's pointless if I don't know what to do once I've found them...)
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

  3. Beattles

    Beattles Well-Known Member

    let me know how it works out mate. remember never settle for anything less than a beautiful, good looking girl who makes you happy and is into the same stuff you are into.
  4. danni

    danni Chat Buddy

    hmm well i acn give you some tips hun :hug:

    1, how are you doing

    (try being ur self in the convo)

    2 (if she wearing something like muisc or a a store you can talk about it)
    ah i see you like _____ (carrying on the convo)

    hopeful that will tlk then continue more about you and what you like, and what she like ect....

    I hope that helps a lil hun :hug:
  5. Veclord

    Veclord Active Member

    I want to know this too! So many times I've found girls that attract me to death, but I never approach because always sit there just wondering what the hell to say!

    Also, what's a good explanation of things not to and NEVER to do? Some girls here help us out and tell us the things that could turn you off in a situation like this?
  6. ggg456

    ggg456 Guest

    Well, not all 'girls' are the same but personally speaking, just a "hello" and "how's stuff" is just fine..
    and the conversation would just develop.

    all the leaning against poles/walls and posing stuff is just funny. if someone did that to me I'd start laughing (that's just me though). But if I liked the person I'd find it endearing..
  7. Beattles

    Beattles Well-Known Member

    meh, thats just me.. maybe it works, maybe it dosnt but its just what i do. not consciously though, i dont force myself to do it but yeah.
    its not posing either lol.
  8. Veclord

    Veclord Active Member

    Ok, I've actually read lots of articles about hooking up with women and what not. Here's just a little about what I found out (GIRLS HERE VERIFY THIS PLZ):

    Desperation and clinginess they find really unattractive, so projecting ANY of that makes you lose points from the get go. Women want someone they can depend on and feel secure, so they don't feel all that secure with a guy that doesn't at least do a good job of pretending to have his own head straight.

    Pick up lines never work. They just don't, so forget it! They're good for a laugh and that's about it. I think that if they're funny enough and you got her to laugh that it'd be an awesome way to get the conversation started. But again, it's a big risk.

    It's hard to come up with fun witty things to say. A trick I read about is to get girls to talk about themselves. That keeps you from getting your mind scrambled up trying to think stuff to say. It takes some of us men longer to get our brains flowing and come up with stuff to say (particularly when we're talking to a girl we think is hot!!). The trick is to just keep directing the conversation toward her and every now and then stick in a small flirty compliment to let her know you still think she's interesting. You can pay attention while she talks and talks and talks, and all that gives you enough time to think up new questions and funny comments that are based on what she's telling you.

    I IMed this girl from myspace and tried this stuff. I'm serious! It really works!
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 17, 2007
  9. dude....

    dude.... Guest

    Forget all of this stuff, seriously. Just talk to them the same way you would anyone else. They're human beings.
  10. jonstark

    jonstark Well-Known Member

    Yah but the stuff about seeming desperate (real turn-off, you can see in the girl's eyes) and getting them to talk about themselves is true. I speak from experience.
  11. Pioneer

    Pioneer Well-Known Member

    This is the very question I want answered as well.
  12. ggg456

    ggg456 Guest

    I agree. Some people put people they like way up on a pedestal and get very anxious when there's no need, they are just like you, probably anxious too.
  13. Veclord

    Veclord Active Member

    It doesn't have anything to do with putting anyone on a pedestal or trying to put on a pony show for attention. By nature, women develop attraction towards men who emanate confidence and security (whether he's nice about it or not) and I'm not the only one who thinks so. Also, good luck just walking up and talking to a girl you like the same way you would anyone else without going out of your way to project any kind of special interest.
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