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How do I explain to people I want to die?

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Spanner, Jul 25, 2012.

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  1. Spanner

    Spanner New Member

    I will never be good enough, so it really would be best if I wasn't here anymore. I have decided how I want to kill myself but I can't do it because of my family. My Mum would probably do herself in too, and it would destroy my Dad and sisters. My friends would be fine. How do I explain to my family and counsellor that it's what I want? Is there any way I can do this with it being ok for the one's I leave behind?
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 25, 2012
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    YOu tell your councillor outright that the thoughts of leaving are always are your mind that you want peace Your therapist will help you they will not judge y ou hun
    No there is no way to make it ok to leave hun suicide hun it not only takes one life it takes all the ones left behind as well. Many have thoughts of suicide hun and don't act on it because they know the destruction it will bring Instead be open with your councillor and get the supports you need to heal ok hugs
  3. pickwithaustin

    pickwithaustin Staff Alumni

    total eclipse is correct and nothing I can add to that.
    I know everyone says, "It will get better," and I know that doesn't sound fair to say when you feel that it won't. Maybe it will get better, maybe it will not... But if you leave, you will never know for sure. Talk to someone like the therapist - get some help from their feedback/input. Times really do change, believe me.
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    I don't think there's anyway you can make it 'ok'. People would be hurt even devastated. Please hang going and keep trying. We care here, keep talking to us, x
  5. dachigrl

    dachigrl New Member

    Dear Spanner,

    I so hear you and personally relate to your desire to just die and not leave a trail of pain to those you care about. I appreciate hearing that you don't want to cause others pain and that it is what is keeping you from acting on it. That means to me, you don't really want to die, you just want relief from the suffering/pain that you're going through. And someone that is that concerned about hurting others, usually doesn't want to die either. I think you just need and want relief and I believe both are available for you!

    You said you'll never be good enough...can you elaborate on that? Is there anyway you can allow yourself to be where you are right now, with out judgement. Can you open up to the possibility of being enough and that there is love and support for you right where you are (with out having to change or be different). These might feel like radical ideas and very far off, but if you can at least open to their possibility there will be an openness and a slight lightness in your experience for solutions and support to come rushing in.

    My experience of being suicidal is that I get so focused on my pain and suffering that I literally can't see anyway out of it but when I can soften and get honest about what I'm feeling (anger, hurt, rejection, etc) and just let myself have my feeling...then that helps me. Giving all of my attention to killing myself doesn't allow me to actual move through the experience, it just keeps me stuck in feeling the pain, isolation and then shame that comes from being in such a hurtful, destructive place. I really believe you are enough as you are and that things can and will shift for you. I hope you can be patient with yourself while you heal and keep reaching out and staying in the conversation. I believe relief is here for you. It's just a matter of being willing and open to it and staying curious as to what will bring you relief.

    Holding you in light and love.

    DaChiGrl (fellow traveler)
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