1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

How do I forget her?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by Suicideisonmymind, May 9, 2013.

  1. Suicideisonmymind

    Suicideisonmymind New Member

    There was this girl who I loved more than anything in the world. We dated and she said that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with me. About 3 months ago she told me she didn't love me anymore. Of course, I still love her. She's dating someone else now and I tried to kill myself the other day because of her. She's still my best friend, but everything hurts. When will I move on? How do I forget her? Please help.
  2. Wastingecho

    Wastingecho Well-Known Member

    pm'd you
  3. cloud9

    cloud9 Well-Known Member

    I know how this hurts. I know firsthand myself. Stay strong. It will get better.
  4. prakash

    prakash Well-Known Member

    It is very common for young people to try to kill themselves when a person they love dump them. So, take solace in the fact that you are not alone.
    My best advice is to try to forget her. Do not associate with her because this will remind you of the past.
    Out of sight out of mind.
    so, try to get her out of sight.
    There are plenty of fish in the sea.
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    My new rule in life is, if someone is upsetting or bothering me-I will delete them from my life. Just like on facebook -block-. I know it is very difficult but if this issue is taking you as far as wanting to end your life you know you need to do something about it and fast. Have you any interest in dating other girls?
  6. clevername

    clevername Member

    You're not going to forget someone you love. You're not going to change her mind. She's gone, not coming back, and it is her decision.

    The only thing you can really do, is figure out what it is about her that makes her "wrong for you," and embrace it, and accept that you loved someone who wasn't right for you. It happens.

    Take care of yourself, make the best you you can, and try to find someone else.

    It's not easy surviving "wrong love," but some people do actually recover and have decent lives.

    And who knows, perhaps someday the two of you can really be just friends, without any pains from the past.

    People throw around cliches in this situation, but i can tell you that it doesn't really ever go away, and you don't really ever forget. The sooner you lock-down that reason she's wrong for you, the better.
  7. The best way to get over somebody is to remove them from your life. It sounds terrible and it is extremely hard to do, trust me I know. I lived with a woman, we were together for 7 years and when she left, we were still in regular contact. I still love her, but once she started dating someone else the feelings of despair and heartbreak got 100x worse. The best way to move forward is to do it without her. It's much harder on you to have the feelings you do, and to watch her be with someone else the way that you want to be with her. You cannot sort out your own thoughts and feelings when you are dealing with the constant reminder of what is gone. The hardest thing for me to face was the fact that she is gone. She made her decision... and if you trully want to move forward from this you need to do it without her.

    If you ever need to talk to someone who knows what it is like to go through something like this you are more than welcome to PM me. :) You can get through this!

    Best of luck!
  8. krazor

    krazor Active Member

    Hardest thing to do is let go but its what you need to do.
    Delete/block her numbers block her facebook ect all need to be done for you to get through it. it will be the hardest thing in the world to do but just remember there are millions upon millions of people out there you will find somebody.
    I was with the ex 3 years before we split it tore my heart out made me feel like ending it all but after a friend took my phone and cut any contact i had with her i slowly started realizing she wasn't the perfect girl that nobody would ever compare to or could replace and i started getting on with things. The main thing to do is divert your attention go out with friends do something random you have never done before and make sure you stay active so you dont have time to think about it. i wont lie it wont all go away in a week but the pain you feel will go i promise :)
  9. pancake111

    pancake111 Well-Known Member

    Wow, this sounds vaguely familiar. The same thing happened to me. I was going out with this girl, she told me she loved me, then she said she didn't want to date me, and now she's obsessing over all these other people. I don't know what happened to make her not like (love) me anymore.

    What has helped me is that I've had to realize that I am better than her. I deserve someone who actually loves me. It's hard, but it's something you have to get through.
  10. strawberry gashes

    strawberry gashes Active Member

    I was in the same spot about a year ago felt like the whole world was over after my first and only since girlfriend dumped me and moved on about a week later. I can't say it will get better right away but I to this day am amazed at how much of a fool I was for being so caught up in her. I can't speak for you but live your life my friend and this will be a tough moment in your life but you will come out strong in the end I just know it :) If you need anyone to talk to just message me okay?
  11. Big M

    Big M Well-Known Member

    Really happy you survived. The void that I felt when I broke up with my long time girlfriends was not fun and I wasn't even all that into them to be honest with you. Try to find a really good friend. It is hard, but once you do I think you will find yourself starting to begin the process of recovery from the break up.
  12. critter

    critter Member

    screw someone else, and send her the pictures:) works every time
  13. SaraRose

    SaraRose Well-Known Member

    I know your pain. When my girlfriend broke up with me after almost 2 years I felt so devastated that I tried to kill myself. It's hard, it hurts a lot for a while- I know it does and as weird as it sounds. It does get better. The best thing you can do is for right now delete them out of your life. It may sound harsh but block the calls, texts. If she's on facebook take her off your news feed. Take the time you need to heal yourself before anything. After you're able to heal yourself a little then you can see if communication is possible. I found out with my girlfriend that pretty much she's so bitter against me that almost all communication is not possible- except for once a month; so I continue to keep her off my page on FB.

    I also send my thoughts to you.
  14. dexj36

    dexj36 Member

    Everyone is very right. You need to delete her from your life. This is what allows you to mourn.

    Losing a loved one through a break up can cause you to go through the similar stages of loss when a loved one dies. Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance. Of course, everyone is different and deals with things in unique manners. To me, bargaining is one of the toughest because it is so hard to not reconnect with her.

    I'm going through the same thing, friend. I am absolutely miserable. Absolutely freaking miserable. But reading your post made me realize something.. if I feel this bad and I were to end my life.. then that would cause other people in my life to experience the miserable feelings I'm going through now. And I can't do that to what's left of my family and those I know. I cannot punish them with this misery and depression.

    Block her. Delete her. Remove her and any other triggers.
  15. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    Try looking at dating as a way to find out what type of person you want to be and what type of person you would like to have around. I am sure your ex seemed great, but I doubt she was perfect. Write down her good qualities and her bad. Time halls wounds like the one she made but over time you will heal. You will realize she was just one woman out of many and then you will bee ready to give another relationship a go.
    You can also work on what you believed was the problem on your part. FYI it wasn't all your fault but each person contributes.
  16. Lorax

    Lorax Well-Known Member

    I just went through hell as well. I was only in for 3 months, and 2 of "lets be friends" she told me how she loved me more than her self, we talked about the future. But in the end her family said no, so despite being an adult (legally) she just dumped me. We tried being friends, but every time we saw each other, we couldn't stand being friends. Right after telling me she loved me.. She ignored all my calls/texts. She was talking about how great her "best friend" is.. The one she used to love. Who came back right before this. I wanted to die, i still feel a void in my heart. But i realized, if she was that fast to cut me out.. What if it had been 3 years and a child later? If she could move on so fast then clearly we were not meant for each other. Above all, i found turning the pain of what you lost into optimism about what you can share again. Imagine if you have the love for her, towards someone that will return it full force. No one is perfect. It's hard to look at your ex right after as being flawed. Just remember that we are all human, we all hurt our loved ones, we all make mistakes. We all move on. If you die now, you're making it so the person you' ve been waiting for will never have your love. You may not meet them right away, but when you do, you will be happy you moved on. I may be young, but i know the pain of love