how do i know.....

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by solipism79, Oct 9, 2015.

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  1. solipism79

    solipism79 Member

    I wanna start off saying that this is my first post and even if nobody reads this I need to say it. I have never been a very emotional person but over the last 3 years I seem to have just stop feeling anything for anyone and that includes me more than most. Alot of people have told me I am depressed but what does that feel like?? When I have talked about suicide the go-to line is about it being the cowards way out but I just can't see it like that. Suicide can be many things. Desperate. Sensible. Noble. Tragic. The ultimate exercise of free will. But cowardly? It is an animals primary instinct to stay alive at any cost. To override that whatever the reason we take a fully conscious act of responsibility, possibly the only real one we can ever make.
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi there just want to say I have read your post and hope you are doing okay today. I disagree though that suicide can be sensible, to whom is it sensible to? It should never be considered an option because there is always help available. No matter how bad it gets it can always get better. Help is always there and someone somewhere will understand.
  3. solarflare

    solarflare Well-Known Member

    I disagree. I am suicidal and I see it as a cowards way out. For me it is like a mathematical equation:

    Effort and pain required to solve my problems > Effort and pain of suicide

    And the cowardly part is i completely disregard what it will do to other people around me. I know there will be people who will greatly suffer and be affected by it. But my cowardly act is my attitude that I wont be around to see it. So I try to justify it by saying things like "they'll get over it", "they'll understand" etc. Suicide is a cowards way out and I'm a lowlife coward so it fits. I could never see it as courageous or noble.

    Sorry for slapping you across the face this way with this but this isn't something I think I should sugarcoat.

    Thats how I feel about it all anyway.

    Hope you find support here, be sure to come in and say hi in the chat rooms :)
  4. solipism79

    solipism79 Member

    But what if like me you don't have anyone who cares about you?? I have no family and since I stop working and came back to England no friends, I just can't see my death upsetting anyone and it just seems better than carrying on like this.
  5. Piehawker

    Piehawker Member

    I've never met you, but I care. I also live in England. It's tough being alone. I've started counselling to deal with my crippling loneliness, trust issue and self loathing. But there are people out there, you may feel totally alone (I do most of the time). This site has been a great help. People here care. You can talk to us. No matter how lost you are, hold on. Even when there is nothing left in you except that tiny voice that says hold on.

    I'm here if you need to chat.
  6. afterlifepig

    afterlifepig Well-Known Member

    what you're describing sounds almost like the negative symptoms of schizophrenia. (i have schizophrenia but no negative symptoms.) i don't know if there is any treatment for that, but considering that there are so many drugs out there i think it is definitely a possibility.

    i knew one person who had symptoms like that and her situation was not good. negative symptoms might have some kind of a biological component, meaning it's an actual mental illness that can strike if you are biologically predisposed.... you should probably consult with a psychologist or psychiatrist
  7. solarflare

    solarflare Well-Known Member

    That still doesnt change the equation, just part of the ramifications. Assuming it is indeed the case.

    And in this day and age we can use computers to connect people who would otherwise never come into contact and talk about these things. There are/will be people who care here if no where else.
  8. True-Lee

    True-Lee Well-Known Member

    Hi solipism, I see you have been answered several times over, so people are reading and paying attention to what you are saying, I say thank you for what I feel is a logical definition of that Word, I say you are spot on mate! but that does not make it a good choice, simply because it is an illogical act, it bothers people so much because of it's very nature as you said it goes against the Natural Order. I do not think or feel it is cowardly at all., I would not ever promote it for anyone. I am not able to say anything about your medical condition, it is out of my understanding I will say that I believe you have come to one of the right places to enter into a discussion, I can't say if you are in depression, I can say that I believe you have some interest in Suicide, right wrong and good or bad,, Welcome, you are safe here you have seen that people have responded to you and they truly care! no matter where you are going, I do wish you the best no matter!
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