So I'm back here after 2 months. I've been living in a kind of daze, just letting stuff happen to me. Here's my issue: now is the time to look for a real, permanent teaching job (I'm in Australia, school year begins January). I'm being offered jobs. Everyone who looks at my resume says I'm over-qualified for everything going. But I get no job when interviews come around - and I know why. For 7 years I worked at the Worst School in China. In the last year supervisor from hell forced me to end my contract in June. I was a loner - always planning to off myself before the worst happened. No friends. I have let all professional contacts slide. Even people who reached out to me, I did not answer their emails, thinking that it was over, that i was worthless, and people were better off not knowing me. Facebook is a nightmare - i can't use my account. What can I say? Nearly 40 years old, living with my abusive parents, no friends, no life, no real job. How can I reconnect to these people? I know it's not right to rely on people I haven't spoken to for references, but I can't tell them the real reason I never made true friends with them is that I'm suicidal.