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How do I tell my parents......

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by aki, Apr 1, 2008.

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  1. aki

    aki Well-Known Member

    .......that I want to move out?
    I find it hard to talk to them, especially my dad. I find it hard to even be in the same room as him. I've been saving up for a while and I've got enough now, I'm old enough, everything's sorted...I just can't...tell them. I can't build up the courage.:mellow:
  2. theleastofthese

    theleastofthese SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Yes, that could be a hard subject to broach to one's parents... especially if you've been particularly close or maybe they are very close to you. Are you the last of a bunch of kids? If that's so I can see how they'd be upset to lose their "last one". However the situation, it's YOUR life and only YOU can decide what you're going to do with it. If you put it to them gently, as in telling them how much you appreciate their upbringing, and how it's helped you prepare to live on your own... and so on... Compliment them on their good parenting (hopefully it WAS good parenting) and tell them you'll not "be a stranger". That you'll visit and keep in touch as often as possible.

    Now all the above hinges on your parents and you having a good relationship. If that is not the case, then I can't advise you how to approach it gently, only to just state your case and get on with it. And in the end, it IS, after all, YOUR life, right?:wink:

    And if their response is negative and hurtful, as if you were "injuring" them by your decision to move out and be on your own... then you must just do what you have to do - for YOURSELF - and be done with it.

    Good luck to you.
  3. aki

    aki Well-Known Member

    Thanks for your reply. I should have explained a bit more in my first post.
    I had a tough time in my teenage years with my parents, but now me and my mum get on ok. I don't get on with my dad at all though.
    The main thing is, my parents don't seem to have any faith in me. I know they don't think I'll be able to cope on my own. They've said this a few times, therefore making me doubt myself a little. The thing is, they're either saying this or saying, 'it's time to move out' if we have arguments. I don't know how to convince them I can do it.
  4. theleastofthese

    theleastofthese SF Friend Staff Alumni

    How about, as Nike says, JUST DO IT! Make all the arrangements and then tell them when you'll be moving out. They'll have to get over it eventually, you know, and your prolonging the 'agony' won't help anyone, least of all you. Like the title of a great movie starring Richard Dreyfuss: WHOSE LIFE IS IT ANYWAY? It's yours, so go live it!!:smile:
  5. aki

    aki Well-Known Member

    Thanks a lot. I know this is the only way to do it. Just go for it. I just needed it to be confirmed! :biggrin:
    I just wish people wouldn't doubt me. But I'm pretty sure I can do it. I just need courage. I have to prove them wrong!
    This is one of those life defining moments, I just know it. :smile:
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