How do you hide misery and depression from friends?

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Shogun, Apr 27, 2008.

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  1. Shogun

    Shogun Well-Known Member

    What are you supposed to do/say when you meet up with a friend and he/she immediately says something like "You look so miserable, what's wrong?"

    I used to be a really good actor and could always hide how I truly felt, but I'm reaching a stage now where I am so down that I can't even fake a smile anymore. I still have a tiny bit of pride left and just need something to say back when someone feels the need to point out my misery. Absolutely none of my friends know I suffer with depression by the way, they're not the kinda people you can tell.

    I just told him I had a headache and that's why I looked so down, but it was obvious he didn't believe me.
  2. Emptysoul

    Emptysoul Well-Known Member

    ive hidden it for years, started hiding it before I met all my m8s, longest any of them have known me is 5 years. I found the best way was to apear misrible most of the time so knowone notices that Im feeling down
  3. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    i don't hide it. i let them know when i am suffering, and ask for what i need (a hug, a chat, a cup of tea, a sofa to crash on). that way, they can help to keep me alive. i really need my friends.
  4. ItThing

    ItThing Well-Known Member

    Are you sure they won't understand? Try talking about it to people you don't know as well and don't have high expectations so it's not as if you're shocking them with the news. And about the people who don't know you as well, try telling them part of it and see if they get off your case.
  5. Pensive

    Pensive Well-Known Member

    For me it was my friends who talked me into getting help in the first place, but none of them really believe how hard it is for me to actually do it as a day in day out process. I too am good at covering my pain up, I've had practise for almost ten years, but it all eventually bubbles over for me and I need my space...
  6. Shogun

    Shogun Well-Known Member

    There's no way I could tell them, they'd rip the absolute piss outta me if I did. I call them my friends, but really they're just people I've known for years that I occasionally play football with and go to a resaurant with once in about a 6 month period. I don't have any true friends, these people are all I've got.
  7. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    I dont really see that much of my friends anymore. The only person I see a lot of is my bf. At work i put on a Facade. When I do feel like i want to cry and be miserable I lock myself in my office pretending I am doing some paperwork. I do hide it from my bf as he seems to be quite affected by my moods and dont want to bring him down with it. I do spend a lot of time on my own so dont have to hide it. Although my housemate did catch me crying today. I wasn't expecting her back and was getting so stressed out and down that I just cried and cried. I just told her I stubbed my toe... she knows I am a clumsy oaf!
  8. ggg456

    ggg456 Guest

    I don't have friends but when I did have a few casual friends, that's probably why they didn't find me much fun, I looked so pissed off all the time :laugh:
  9. SAVE_ME

    SAVE_ME Well-Known Member

    To be honest....sure, I tried hiding it in the beginning...but then eventually it started to spill over into my chats with them and now they all know. Like today, I was talking to my gf and she says "What's wrong? You don't sound so good" and at first I was like "Oh...nothing worth fussing over" but she kinda had to push me to get a response out of me. But do you know what I say? Why hide it? I mean, I find it better just to get things out in the open, and then I feel much better after I've had a good old chat with them. If they're true friends, they'll understand, and they won't feel the need to judge you or put you down or avoid you or w/e. Real friends look out for one another.
  10. ZERO2008

    ZERO2008 Well-Known Member

    this is easy for me as i have no friends anyway
  11. Bob26003

    Bob26003 Well-Known Member

    Nothing scares friends away like depression. :dry:
  12. notmyrealname

    notmyrealname Well-Known Member

    I've been hiding it all since about 12-13 years old. I'm 26 now, it helps not to have any friends.
  13. *shifty eyes*

    *shifty eyes* Active Member

    I have friends lots of them, or so I am told. I'm invisible to everyone so i just blend into the background, unless i'm i cosplay then everyone loves me and its easy to fake happiness, as for a moment i guess i'm a bit happy. and i do have friends and they know how to cheer me up for a little while at least. one of my guy friends know i have a huge crush on him, and he finds it amusing that i'm so terrified of him yet love being near him. Last night just as i was going to harm myself, he said yes to hanging out with me for the day one friday. it stopped the tears right away, and the ones that can read my body languages will just pull me into a hug/cuddles until i fall asleep or calm down. Friends i never thought who knew. Best way i find is to muster a smile as much as possible, and if you can say you have a stomach ache or if you're a girl abdomen cramps, as any girl who has experienced them know how painful they are. Or that you couldn't sleep so you're just tired hennce why you look like crap.
  14. carol2237

    carol2237 Guest

    For me, I have always been able to hide things from people. It is part of how i grew up. Expressions other than happiness were not allowed to be shown, so now, things are still the same. I have 2 best friends, both of which i have known since 2nd grade, and until i told them about a month ago, they didnt realize i was depressed at all. But as I said, that is just how i grew up...

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