How do you keep bouncing back?

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by nicesinging1, Oct 18, 2010.

  1. nicesinging1

    nicesinging1 Well-Known Member

    Hello. One of the most frequent advices I have heard from people regarding my depression is, "Keep fighting. Never give up." But after 12 years of never-ending torments and depression, I start losing faith and begin to wonder if it is worth fighting after all.
    Basically, my depression is so chronic and erratic that it never surprises me how often I fall down and have to bounce right back up. But recently, instead of somehow getting myself back up, I start having apathetic thoughts like, "Why even bother? What is the use? What did all the tryings, struggles, therapies, and personal efforts get me? I am still struggling mightily after 12 years."
    In the past, I had more hope, optimism and high morality which helped me bounce back quickly. But now, after 12 years, I lack hope, optimism and get easily demoralized by each setback making it hard to bounce back.

    How do you guys bounce back after each setback instead of giving up or feeling demoralized?

    Thanks in advance for insights.
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Personally, I hold on to something/someone meaningful for me...I think it varies for each person and try to wait out the storm...J
  3. Daigoro

    Daigoro Member

    For me, the shame of people finding out about who I really am and what I think and feel is greater than the pain of carrying on.

    I only very rarely let my real self show, except in private. The rest of the time I'm just acting out a role for the benefit of other people.

    One day I'll not care anymore, and that day will change my life forever. That day scares me
  4. MightyMatt

    MightyMatt Well-Known Member

    Hey Daigoro,

    You sound very much in the same boat as myself at the moment. It's kinda tough offering advice on this subject because everyone one is so different and their personal issues are so very varied. I think you've made the right step talking about it here though, to me that shows you want to 'recover' from your set backs... and in time you will. I'm not saying that this will be easy and you may have more little set backs on the way... But you do have to keep on 'fighting it'. I tend to keep my problems to myself so SF is a great outlet for me, I also see a therapist, try telling at least one person you can trust too.. this took a massive weight off my shoulders when I did this! Other than that try focusing on your interests. Do you have any hobbies you enjoy? If you do try and focus on these and spend your free time being busy in a positive way. I hope this is of some help :smile:
  5. Daigoro

    Daigoro Member

    Hi Matt, thanks for your words.

    My problem is that I feel hollow and joyless. On paper, I'm not doing to bad for myself compared to some people, I just have no joy in anything I do. I'm getting myself to a few football matches, I used to love that, but I feel like a spectator in my own life, not a participant. I feel detached and ambiguous about myself.

    My energy and enthusiasm for life has evarporated, and like Nicesinging1 said in the original post, why bother?

    I don't WANT to be like this, who would? I have no idea how to break free of it though. Therapy seems pointless so far, hurting myself is not on my agenda, though it crosses my mind regularly I don't want to do it, I just want to be happy again
  6. MightyMatt

    MightyMatt Well-Known Member

    This is exactly my situation! Good job everything going for me... but something inside tells me I'm not good enough and i just don't enjoy my achievements... walking around not caring about anything anymore.

    Why bother? You said it yourself... You want to be happy! That is exactly why you should bother. To me it's sounds as though you are doing all the right things. keep going to The football matches, thats great (Who's your team?). I know your not keen on therapy right now but give it a chance, you might surprise yourself. It won't happen right away give yourself time. it is a long road but you've come this far, right? I know it feels like your going through the motions right now thats how I feel but trust me it will get better. :smile:
  7. Daigoro

    Daigoro Member

    I hope you're right Matt, I feel like a hamster in a wheel right now, everything feels so mundane. I not given up yet, not quite, I just don't have the energy to carry on.

    I cling to the hope that it won't always be this way. Maybe the only way is up, who knows?