Here is my story, and my solution. Back when I was 15 I brought home the flue and made my family sick. My father then killed himself, and my grandmother died of cancer shortly after. I had three chances to stop him, but I didn't pick up on what he was gonna do, I even woke up right before he did it. Needless to say I blamed myself and wanted to die. I had the gun in my hand, but I figured my grandmother still needs me, and when she died soon after I no longer had a gun, but I drowned my sorrows away slowly, I also had a few relationships that didn't work out, they broke my heart. I struggled with suicidal feelings for many years after that, I tried to drown them in video games, entertainment, drugs, and various other forms of escapism from reality. My life got nowhere, and I couldn't find the motivation to get anywhere. Finally, I found a solution. I realized there was a side of me that wanted to die and a side of me that wanted to live, which prevented me from attempting to kill myself, so the only thing I could do was compromise. What I mean by compromise is that I did kill myself, but also that I didn't. The person who is living and breathing today is merely here for the purpose of helping and serving other people. I wanted to know where I'd go when I died so I did a big study on spirituality, and decided I'd make a full investment with heaven. I expected to still be miserable, but much to my surprise I found that making others happy made me happy. I no longer had any expectations, hopes, or selfish desires, whenever I encountered something negative I just reminded myself that I'm dead and there was no point in taking any offense. The other unexpected thing was the joy I felt. This is what the gospel calls "the peace of God which surpasses all understanding." I thought for sure it would be impossible for God to make me any joy. Let's just say God likes a good challenge. Here's some encouragement if you wanna try the living dead approach to suicidal feeling. Galatians 2:20 "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." 2 Corinthians 5:17 "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" Think your life is worthless? Tempted to put an end to it? Then you probably wouldn't have a problem being a martyr. That means all the more glory for you up there in heaven. When it's not you that live, but Christ that lives within you, life indeed becomes interesting. Life as you know it, according to your plans, and your desires, is gone, but a whole new life of adventure will begin. Don't be fooled or dismayed if most professing people of faith don't get this. Truth is, they like their lives, they might even love their lives onto the death. The strength of God is made perfect in weakness, and when we're down on our knees ready to kick the bucket, it don't get any weaker then that. And really, what else are ya gonna do? It won't solve your problems to die and wind up in a place full of even more torture and sorrow then this world. You'd might as well cash in on God.