How I feel during attempts

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by caliban, Oct 9, 2011.

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  1. caliban

    caliban Active Member

    It's a sadness very deep. Profoundly deep. Fear. Extreme terrifying fear as well. But whenever I am close I have a fighting instinct that kicks inside me. Seems to be similar to my life in general. I will lose everything and give up hope but I somehow start up again when I become too uncomfortable. Wish I could just follow through and accept the emptiness.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    human instinct is to fight i hope you keep fighting because one day it will pay off i believe that hugs
     
  3. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Suicide goes against everything we are.. It isn't easy..I've tried three times..Failed each time because my human nature kicked in..Two of the times I wasn't able to do anything but ride it out..I was unconcious..No one in my family knows of this..So please listen to that little voice inside you.. It won't guide you wrong..
     
  4. Witan

    Witan Member

    That's something I'm still trying hard to learn and believe.
     
  5. goaway

    goaway New Member

    What if the little voice inside you is telling you suicide is the right thing, and you have to use logic to override it?
     
  6. Witan

    Witan Member

    I get that too sometimes. I think of it as the "angel" and the "demon", with the "demon" being the voice that keeps driving me to kill myself, and the "angel" the part of me that somehow always brings me back from the edge.
     
  7. Broken Wings

    Broken Wings Well-Known Member

    I've startled myself out of attempts with the thought of "What am I doing?!"
    Even though I know precisely what I am doing, and why.

    Instinct is stronger than emotion, I think is what it comes down to.
     
  8. BlueGuitar

    BlueGuitar Member

    It's like a virus that wants to keep you living so you can suffer even more and feed it.
     
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