How I feel.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by qpzm, Jan 21, 2014.

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  1. qpzm

    qpzm New Member

    How do you feel when you see somebody your age living a better life than you? They walk around with their girlfriend/boyfriend, while you sit there with nothing. I have not had a girlfriend all my life, and I consider myself asexual because of it. The fact of the matter is, it absolutely sucks. I would love to have a kid one day, so I can spoil him/her. But I just don't see it happening, I am not lying when I say this, I have not spoken to a female besides my mother in 7 months, and it was one word. "Hi". I have never attempted suicide, mainly because I don't have any <mod edit - methods> in my house. I don't want to fail and live with the embarrassment. My first attempt will be a <mod edit >. I have no friends at all. I'm the biggest waste of a life there ever was and ever will be. Nothing makes me happy, I even bought myself and Xbox One. I thought it would bring my happiness up a little but it just doesn't. I feel nothing will ever bring me happiness and I don't know what to do. I never posted on any other forum about my suicidal feelings, and I've never told anybody to help me. I don't like to burden others with my problems.

    Sorry if I jumped from topic to topic a little bit, that is just a fraction of what this pathetic life consists of.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 22, 2014
  2. ub3

    ub3 Banned Member

    You are not a burden to anybody here. This is the right place to reach out for help you've made that first step which is often the hardest. You are not alone in your suffering I too haven't had a girlfriend for ten.years and.often feel like a freak. But I just have to grin and bear it and get on with life. All I can say is that it could be worse it.can always be worse. When I thought my life was over worse. But then suddenly something good happened but.I still managed to mess it up and often feel like ending it. So I just let you know that you are not alone.
  3. SuicideSam

    SuicideSam Banned Member

    Keep reaching out dude. Have you tried speaking to a coucilor or therapist? You wont burden them, its thier job to help people?

    Stay safe and stay strong
  4. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    I am glad you started to talk here a little bit- A lot of people here have found themselves in similar situations and may be able to relate to what you are feeling. If you feel like telling us a little more about yourself maybe some that have a lot in common or were in similar situations can give some advice or pointers on how they have managed. Do you go to school or work? Any hobbies that help pass th etime at least, or how old you are?

    Hope to hear more from you.
  5. qpzm

    qpzm New Member

    I'm 19
    I do not have a job
    I play Video Games between 10-12 hours a day. Sometimes more.
    I have Bipolar Disorder (It's extremely bad to the point where I do not think I will be able to live a normal life)
    Minor anxiety issues
    Death and Suicide are always on my mind (there are times when I even dream about it, it's weird)
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