I like to sit around and think. After some recent events I look at the road put out ahead of me and wonder how long I can last, walking down this road? Being optimistic I can say I will last until my 27th birthday. Roughly 2.2 years. However realistically I see myself dying a month before my lease is up. Provided some kind of miracle does not happen of course. Even if I spend the next year trying to get better. I still see myself failing to make it all the way to next year. I still see myself giving up breaking under the stress of my own weak heart. Right now I do not feel like I will make it to tomorrow. Who knows maybe I won't.