How Long Can I Keep Suffering?

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Forgotten_Man, Apr 30, 2010.

  1. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I like to sit around and think. After some recent events I look at the road put out ahead of me and wonder how long I can last, walking down this road? Being optimistic I can say I will last until my 27th birthday. Roughly 2.2 years. However realistically I see myself dying a month before my lease is up. Provided some kind of miracle does not happen of course.

    Even if I spend the next year trying to get better. I still see myself failing to make it all the way to next year. I still see myself giving up breaking under the stress of my own weak heart.

    Right now I do not feel like I will make it to tomorrow. Who knows maybe I won't.
  2. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    don't give up...:hug:
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    i was right there with you today almost gave in but had good support here with me holding me back. I hope you can get a hold of your therapist and talk okay I see my t on monday i hope to hold on till then as well. the pain comes and goes but with hellp i hope the pain is less each time hold on okay there is healing there have been people get over the sadness i hope we are one of them take care
  4. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    @IV2010: I am resisting for now. Cannot say how I will feel tomorrow. Luckily I am moving tomorrow so I will have plenty of stress to keep my occupied.

    @~violet~: I don't have a therapist. I have no idea how to go about finding one. I will be able to hold on till then. I need to write-up suicide notes and last wills and stuff so if I do lose my mind and kill myself my roommate won't be screwed.

    I just vent to myself... for now. Because the one person who I feel close enough to talk to about anything is the cause of this state. Plus then I would hurt her, and drive her away ruining my chances of ever getting her back. Lets just hope I can keep myself distracted until this time next year. Not likely but hey I guess I can give it a try.