How long has your depression lasted?

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Chaddiwicker, Dec 11, 2010.

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  1. Chaddiwicker

    Chaddiwicker Well-Known Member

    I would say that my latest bout with depression has lasted 5 years. Sometimes, I think I should be better. I've tried many different meds. Some work for a while then stop. I've had a couple of "good" weeks here or there, but mostly the depression is constant.

    I have done best when I lived alone (only going to necessary appointments), and had a therapist who supported me in doing that. Everyone else wants me to participate in the world, which leads to anxiety for me.

    I worry that people don't believe me when I say that I still feel depressed and that I have been for 5 years.

    I have what I consider 1 maybe 2 good days a week. When I feel good, I feel guilty because I think I should start doing all the things right then that I haven't been doing for the last five years so I don't really even enjoy my "good" days.

    Yesterday was an above average day for me. Actually got a cover letter done for a job I'm going to apply for even though there's little chance I'll get it once they see I haven't done anything for 5 years. Mood is going down hill today. Beating myself up for being unreliable (due to depression), for all my past lies and mistakes. Feeling hopeless about the future.

    Does it ever end? What's the point?
     
  2. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    I know what you mean my last or current depression has lasted over 4 years.I've tried different meds some work for a bit then stop or don't work at all.I know what you mean when you say does it ever end,what's the point?.
     
  3. aoeu

    aoeu Well-Known Member

    Chaddiwicker, I'll again repeat that you should pursue the possibility of bipolar disorder. If they can't get depression under control within a reasonable time frame it's probable that they're treating a disease you don't have - especially since your brother has bipolar disorder.
     
  4. Chaddiwicker

    Chaddiwicker Well-Known Member

    Thank you, aoeu. I'll bring it up with my therapist at our next appointment.
     
  5. nolonger

    nolonger Well-Known Member

    Yea I have good moments here and there, if I can remember them. But I'm starting to think I've never really been happy anyway. Like ever. Just a mere existence/neutral feeling about everything. But of course it 'went bad' a few years ago, and pretty much turned into a negative feeling on most things.
     
  6. Madam Mim

    Madam Mim Well-Known Member

    I have been constantly depressed since I was 12, so for 13 years now. It seems ridiculous that I could have spent more than half of my life depressed, but I can't think of any period between then and now that I've been remotely happy, so it must be true.

    I have good days, usually when I am distracted by friends, and the odd good week, perhaps when I am on holiday and can pretend my life is different. Other than that, my life is just one big black mess.

    Mim
     
  7. Illusion

    Illusion Well-Known Member

    I've been on and off depressed since I was 13 years old. I'm 15 years old now and have been nothing really except depressed since October now.
     
  8. boo

    boo Well-Known Member

    About 16 years now. Whoopty doo
     
  9. Roots

    Roots Well-Known Member

    I'm not really sure anymore. Feels like my whole life, but probably since I was about 12 - that's almost ten years with depression.
     
  10. FBD

    FBD Well-Known Member

    hmmm since i can remember...im 21 now....so i guess like umm 15-17 years? i duno the first time i really remember it was when i was 5 and hurting myself...but thats a different story
     
  11. Theseus

    Theseus Well-Known Member

    I think it started around 15 years of age. So that'd make it 13 years.
     
  12. KittyGirl

    KittyGirl Well-Known Member

    Ahh... first; from 14-17; then I had a fairly good patch, and then again at 20-22 and counting.
    It seems that anxiety and agoraphobia always follow my depression.
     
  13. topper

    topper Well-Known Member

    Don't know if it was ever this serious when I was younger but I had other OCD/mental health issues growing up.

    What I recognize as full-fledged depression started in my 20s after my mom died. Now the depressive phases come and go like seasons, usually lasting several months but rarely if ever more than a year.

    For example I felt great around the holidays this time last year, which is usually a troublesome time. But as soon as 2010 started I began going downhill. I started feeling better in the spring thru the summer thank goodness, but I crashed around the beginning of September and it's been downhill since then.

    It just always feels fresh and new when it hits again, and worse than before somehow. I guess b/c I'm older, and I feel I have less options as the days go by.
     
  14. Decode

    Decode Well-Known Member

    Over two years i think, worse in the last year, caused by anxiety.
     
  15. bluegrey

    bluegrey Antiquities Friend

    My depressions started very early, I remember sobbing in church thinking I was going to hell because I felt so terrible about myself- I was seven. Before 2007 depression wasn't my worst problem but since then I've been almost continuously depressed and reached depths I had never experienced or thought possible.
     
  16. aoeu

    aoeu Well-Known Member

    I don't think I've been depressed for more than a few days at a time since June. I'm feeling good without being manic (though I was manic for a couple weeks in November). Bipolar = conquered! :D
     
  17. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    I knew I was or had bi polar before I was firstly diagnosed it was to obvious.Since my teems I've had far to many high and low moods and I'm 35 now.
     
  18. Silverpuddle

    Silverpuddle SF Author

    Thirty years, with a few brief respites here and there.
     
  19. Underground

    Underground Well-Known Member

    Roughly 4 years, now. I started getting depressed in Year 9 at school when I was 14, I'm now 18. That's when I stopped going out, gaining weight and thinking of suicide. Like everyone I have my 'good days' but my life is plagued by this feeling that I'm not happy deep inside, fears for the future, hatred about myself, etc.

    I think it can be cured, but not with professional help alone.. I think there's too many people that seem to think if they get counselling, or get put in a psych ward or on meds their problems will just go away. But in reality, it takes a lot of self-improvement and that's where the problem can be if you have barely any motivation or self-esteem..
     
  20. TWF

    TWF Well-Known Member

    Around 4 years. Since I was 13, I've been depressed to some extent. Suicidal thoughts also started popping up around that age, I've had serious absolutely sickening thoughts for at least 3 years. Ranging from suicide to school shootings at the time I got bullied badly.
    It seems to have calmed down lately, but there are still things keeping me down.
     
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