there's too many things to try to keep up with today i opened the newspaper to read about water rates doubling over the next 2 years. I mean, what is life about unless you have loads of money. it is just working and doing things to sustain life. Why bother? i can't keep up and i am too exhausted to continue to try. i earn a good living and I am studying to improve my earning capacity. but my husband doesn't give a sh** about my contribution to our life. he suffers from aspergers, depression and anxiety. he doesn't understand and i doubt whether he even tries to understand. he thinks nothing of constantly being rude to me. putting me down, berating me in public and verbally abusing whenever his stress levels get too much. he is irrational, and perceives things in totally the wrong way. No matter how much I explain to him, he refuses to believe it is any other way than what he sees. i am sick of trying to manage our life, our kids, our finances, our obligations, health issues and the future. When all that is important to my H is food on the table (he cooks), the clothes are clean (he washes), he has his drinking nights (beer and wine), he has access to his television and favourite dvds. Oh yeah, and the towels are changed regularly. he is obsessive about household stuff. My mother used to say that people who kill themselves are cowards. I disagree, I think that I am finding a smart way out of an intolerable and unsolvable problem. I told my husband how I felt and true to form he promptly turned around and talked about himself and how it would be better for him to "check out" because he has more life insurance.