how to deal without god?

Discussion in 'Opinions, Beliefs, & Points of View' started by annief, Nov 1, 2012.

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  1. annief

    annief Member

    Hi. Everyone gives me the same advice about how even if I don't love myself or no one loves me that "God loves all." I'm having a nagging problem of deep depression, and i do not want to offend anyone on here!!! but I do not believe in a god or any religion really and I'm finding these words of sympathy about god's love just a bit hollow. Im not sure how to deal with my feelings alone. Please help. What do you do when you feel from the depths of your being that you are alone in such a populous world?
  2. JmpMster

    JmpMster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    I think people need to find their own connections to spirituality and explore what they believe in to find a way to make it make sense. I hope somebody can offer you insights if that would be helpful to you as a support and hope.

  3. Tired John

    Tired John Well-Known Member

    Hi Annie. I'm pretty much in that same place, if there were some divine all powerful being, then I can't balance how it would let the world treat so many the way it does. Doesn't add up for me either.
  4. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    Well John and Annie - I do understand the feeling of disconnection, totally. I have battled with God for many years, totally unable to connect with the love that everyone told me He was. The problem was I was confused on a very deep level inside. I had been told from when very young that God = Life.

    And then I wondered why I could not feel I could connect!

    I had to get this 'weld' - sorted - and to realise the truth about reality and this has helped me discover God as he really is - and because that is such a big deal, it's totally an ongoing process, but the problem did not lie with God, but with the mis-beliefs I was believing as truth.

    It's quite complicated from my point of view, but that was because of childhood circumstances - basically they stuffed me up, and I went on to stuff up in turn.

    However, ....... this is not the end of the story. Not at all.

    And, having got further and deeper and higher insights now, which I did not have before, has helped me to see things in a way that does make sense. Check out my thread "Would you like to be re-made?"
  5. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    Hello. I lived most my life with my back turned on Yahweh who people call, God. I didn't handle anything well and would have died if Yahweh didn't save me from myself and others. So I guess my answer is that I couldn't deal with life without Him and I don't encourage anyone else to attempt to either. I can see how you may feel the way you do. It's like someone coming to me and telling me about a person I should know and that they and I would make great friends, but not knowing the person personally holds me back from believeing them. In both cases though we can get to know both Yahweh and others. You are not alone in this life. Even when you may feel like it. Don't just take people's word for it. Anyone can pray and pick up and Bible and read. I did and I read the entire thing through. It was the best thing that I have ever done. I have hope, joy, prosperity, peace, and love. I am blessed with someone who loves me and we have three beautiful children together. If I had kept my back turned on Yahweh I would have been dead. That's how far gone I was in addiction and reckless actions through my addiction mingled with self-hatred and apathy. The choice is yours.
  6. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    Hello. John. I used to feel the same exact way! And there are answers to these questions and I have found them. I will share what I know. While this world was just a thought, Yahweh knew that it was going to be corrupt and evil (rebellious) to His intention and spirit. But He also knew that there were going to be people in this world who would want out, and if given a second chance that they would turn away from the corrupt and rebellious lives that they have always known to be His and to be saved. So Yahweh first sent us, the people He aims to save, His instruction (Bible) to teach us how to conform to His intention and to live in harmony with His spirit that resides in us. He even chose a special group of people to lead us by example and word to show us what He requires through actions and words. But these people struggled and failed. Corrupt leaders (kings and spiritual leaders) turned the people away from Yahweh through lies and flattery for none other than money.
    So when the time was right Yahweh sent His son Yahshua who is the living example of the instruction given to bring us back to Yahweh as all the other prophets of old. Except Yahshua proved He is the son of Yahweh by His ability to heal us through forgivness as Yahweh has only been able to before Yahshua was born. Yahshua died as the perfect sacrifice for our deeds because the penalty of being Yahweh's enemy is destruction and death. We needed a way to start anew with a fresh start and He Yahshua gave it to us by showing us the righteous deeds that we need to do in order to be given a second chance.

    So in short the only reason why this evil corrupt world spins is so that Yahweh can save us to be a part of the new world to come. One that is intune with His spirit and His peace. One where there is no death, desease, or suffering of any kind. A world of pure joy. We are all invited and we are all called to be a part of it. Another really awesome thing about this call is that those who answer the call and dedicate their lives to live as though they are already in the new world as shining examples of truth. We will rule along side the Messiah when He restores all things before judgment day. So in short we will be able to not only save ourselves, but those around us through word and action. HalleluYah.

    This is the Hope of the Bible, but nothing beats reading it for yourself so that Yahweh can enlighten your eyes Himself and give you the proof you desire of His faithfulness.

    This world is not living by His will or intent. The word clearly explains just how opposite it truly is. Peace to you in Yah
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 1, 2012
  7. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    In his book, When Bad Things Happen to Good People, Rabbi Kurshner provides what I have seen to be one of the best presentations of this subject. I am fortunate to believe there is no one recipe for being a 'good' person, and borrow from Jewish and Buddhist beliefs to attempt to be one myself. When I changed my perspective from wanting to be happy to wanting to be content, I found more of a teleology that made sense for me.
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 2, 2012
  8. Tired John

    Tired John Well-Known Member

    Thanks for trying to help, been down the "faith road" hasn't turned the corner for me. I respect and rejoice that it does for others.

  9. bhawk

    bhawk Well-Known Member

    To be honest i find more comfort in a lack of belief in anything other than this life.
    The world, the universe, all of it, is simply beautiful. To think someone consciously created it all if anything downplays the awe inspiring work, that life itself has lived and died to create.
    I find solice in the fact that every cell of my body - and yours - was forged in stars for billions of years, the only newness to us is in our form.
    In my life i have been tortured my my own thoughts, to think i would have to endure the thoughts for eternity sounds like my own personal hell!
    Furthermore, i simply see no logical reason that anyone has EVER given to believe in god, gods, or deities of any kind.
  10. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    I respect where you are at bhawk - but to answer your last statement - the logic seems to be that:

    When you take a look around you, at everything created - to think that it could all have just got here by chance, fluke etc. takes more faith. If you YouTube "The Privileged Planet" - you'll find out more why :)
  11. CosmikJack

    CosmikJack Member

    How to deal without god

    1.You cannot deal with something that isnt there, so that is all.
  12. jimk

    jimk Staff Alumni

    Hi Annie ..welcome to SF and us..I am also a fan of rabbi kushner'sbook.. Helped explain with my nagging thoughts of "where were you???"

    Annie if you can't feel god then at least try to be close with some good people and all just feel the beauty of that.. If you are without those people then say try to find a few friends rite here.. We would love another friend.. You take care, Jim
  13. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    I understand the logic Jack, but what if your certainty of believing that God does not exist - actually is your own mind telling you that He does not exist, and you are happy to believe it, and therefore think that it's true?

    And, because our minds are their own sovereign state, we tend to think that if we believe certain things that that makes those things the absolute truth. And this becomes our way of seeing reality.

    However, all of the above can actually be founded on deep-seated assumptions.

    It pays to check our assumptions - but this depends upon having the motivation to check our assumptions :)

    People can live, survive and flourish on a whole raft of assumptions, until the water starts to leak onto the raft and we start to sink.

    When we find ourselves on a sinking raft - that's when the "dealing" becomes more urgent.

    Hence, I suppose, the title of this thread??
  14. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hard when your beliefs disappear i always use to pray for help then i stopped because i knew the prayers werent' being answered It was me that had to help me and me alone
    i must say though when i did believe at least ihad someone to talk to not just myself does that make sense i had an entity i believed that would listen so i did not feel so alone
    I think peoples spiritual believes can help get them through some very hard times so without that connection it get very lonley i found. sorry mind is not all there today just thoughts i am having
  15. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    Ahh, TE - it is a hard place "when your beliefs disappear". Agreed.

    Personally I was "forced" into a situation where I began to realise that God (as He really is) was my only hope of survival, other than suicide or insanity (there was no more "me alone" to help me) Relying on my own imagination of God was causing me to shun and spurn Him. And (eventually) He showed me the deep reasons I was doing this, when the time was ripe. Sometimes, God allows life to take its toll to the extent that it actually puts us in the best place for becoming 'saved' - such as the Prodigal son story in Luke 15.

    Since I had (subconsciously) been feeding myself lies - it was these that were causing my disconnect. And because of the disconnection from God, other beliefs were binding me up. Whereas the promise is "You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free". The wonderful truth is that Real Truth has the power to overcome lies, and this is what is still saving me, and always will be, unless I choose to completely rebel into apostasy (haven't "arrived" yet!).
    God knew the obstacles that prevented my trust - but even so, it was through the resulting darkness that he showed me the light was still there and could be called upon and increased - completely undeserved of course, which is what makes it all the better :)

    So this is what got me through the hardest time and continues to heal. I absolutely know it was not down to me alone as I was finished.

    Guess what I am trying to say is that God/Yaweh/Jesus is always there, and always available should we care to seek Him out. :)
  16. bhawk

    bhawk Well-Known Member

    Lets start from the beggining, there was nothing, now lets look at nothing....nothing has properties, like mass, 90% of the mass of a proton is actually from the "nothing." Nothing is something, due to "virtual particles" constantly popping in and out of existence.
    Then, once there is something.... Using the laws of physics the universe comes to its present state, logically (all pretty well understood.)
    As for life, abiogenesis is becoming a well understood part of science, we have even found organic compounds on meteorites. We have already created cells from a metallic substance that act as if alive, including reproducing. We have also created artificial life (mycoplasma laboratorium if i remember correctly)
    Then once life has started evolution diversifies the life forms, up to the present state (and still going of course) and all well understood by science.

    There is no "chance" or "fluke"

    How did god become as such, was it "fluke" or "chance" that he simply popped into existence, fully that takes more faith!
  17. Moat

    Moat Banned Member

    As always is the reason I did not reply yet is because I knew that this topic would sooner or later get derailed by personal opinions which lead up to eventual arguments. Sad, when the religious preach peace, but the reality is the opposite.

    However, in accordance with the original poster (and try keeping this thread in good stead and not reply to any philosophical discussions which prove fruitless in the long run of the purpose of this thread), the presence of such a god or absence of one proves nothing if you do not have the absolution.
    For me, no god exists, for I simply do not believe. Whether that is in fact true or false in the overall makes not one bit of difference - it is what I believe to be so, which makes it a certainty, whereas others believe it does exist, which makes it a certainty for them. As far as religion goes, no one is right or wrong in the eyes of anyone else.
  18. justMe7

    justMe7 Well-Known Member

    I suppose it's about how you feel about yourself, and about the life you connect with. Sometimes we define things about ourselves and about the world around us to a point where we rationally cannot let anything connect with who we are. Sorta like, feeling comfortable with who you are, and feeling comfortable with the life outside of yourself, and letting the two touch eachother. Kinda helps to connect, and not feel so alone in life with how things are.
    Sorta starts with, who you are, and talking about what makes you who you are, and possibly losening some definitions you may have for yourself so you can embrace more of life. Cause it is really possibly to isolate yourself so much that you can't feel anything but yourself, which can be very "trying".

    I'm not too sure if this on the same lines as what you mean. I know personally it's difficult to exist, let alone identify with the existence around myself. Identifiying with concepts and beliefes as "god" and creation and so on, can be very, very taxing on who you are. Especially in resistance to it, and acceptance of it(poor wording but, just identifying with the concept of "god" can be a very difficult aspect to see past when you are trying to, simply be you and be happy)

    May I ask in some general sense why you feel alone?
  19. annief

    annief Member

    Thanks, Leif. I appreciate your practical response to my question. I originally posted with a slight cringe at the thought of what theological discussion might follow, but I'm feeling rather desperate. I have no problem with whether or not there is a god, that issue is meaningless here. I don't believe in one nor am I hoping for one. I really just want other's practical solutions for dealing with depression. Like, literally. What does everyone do (run, sing, dance...) in order to fight off negative feelings? I'm asking because I have found that my old confidence-building hobbies and loves are failing to make me feel better, and the constant advice I'm getting is "pray." which is irrelevant for me.
  20. annief

    annief Member

    SBlake, thanks for the advice! I'm trying really hard to like myself these days. I must have forgotten how to do it! I feel alone because I am. There is no one that I have a "connection" with at the moment. I don't have family, few friends, or love. My coworkers and every other person I pass by in my daily routine is just another person. Im craving a connection to someone. I feel that no one around me knows who I am.
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