How to pretend you are ok

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Hurted, Mar 16, 2008.

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  1. Hurted

    Hurted Well-Known Member

    Now im really sorry that i told all people in class that im depressed...
    What is best way to pretend that you are happy? Would i suffer more if i would pretend that i am not depressed?
  2. SAVE_ME

    SAVE_ME Well-Known Member

    Speaking from experience, I don't really think it's a good idea to cover up depression, cause sooner or later, after bottling everything up for so long, it'll all just come out at some point, and it won't be pretty. I find it better to talk things over with a friend anytime I'm feeling depressed or w/e...or even a whole bunch of friends, that's what this site is here for after all :hug:
  3. immure

    immure Account Closed

    its one of my fundamental life rules.
    "fake it till you make it"
    so chin up
    smile big
    walk tall
    its much easier to move through life i think.
  4. TheWr0ngChild

    TheWr0ngChild Well-Known Member

    Emotions, in my experience are like liquid, if you try to keep them in in one area, they will eventualy seep out in another, sometimes you are unaware of this too. I often fake being ok, but I try to give myself "down time" where I can sit and cry and express myself. I do also try to have at leased one person I can be open with about the way I feel. If you have to hide your feelings, please make sure it does not become a constant struggle, I've been there and beleive you me it makes it alot worse, so at leased make sure there is a balence with how much you keep in and let out.
  5. perry_mason

    perry_mason Well-Known Member

    I dont think you can really pretend to be happy and get away with it because it shows in other ways just like Tin_Woman said.

    ive tried putting on a happy face: 'turn that frown upside down!' but it doesnt make up for the fact that inside you are still feeling bad.

    this is probably not good advice at all but i gave up trying to put on a happy face around my so called friends and just shut them out of my life completely.
  6. downnout

    downnout Well-Known Member

    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 16, 2008
  7. Angelo_91

    Angelo_91 Well-Known Member

    In your situation, I would be happy, because at least now you know who your real friends are.
    Just dont make a big scene about it in public and yeah what tin_woman said, balance it.
  8. danni

    danni Chat Buddy

    i wouldn't try to hide your feeling on how you feel, like explane for me if i keep things bottle you i explode on someone not mean to. and i know you probably dont want to do that i'm here if you want to tlk :hug:
  9. Hurted

    Hurted Well-Known Member

    I just simply cant hide... i dont know... i have need to talk all the time:(
  10. jessikah2k8

    jessikah2k8 Well-Known Member

    I have spent ages trying to cover up my depression. I come into school.. and I seem alright. Inside- I'm dying. I just want to burst into tears.. but nearly 8 years at covering it up- you get pretty good at it.

    I wouldn't recommend this though.. it's better to let it out and get help from those around you.
  11. ggg456

    ggg456 Guest

    I usually can't hide it. With me, if I feel bad, I look miserable, if I'm annoyed I look 'mopey' if I feel frustrated/agitated I just can't hide it, if I want to be touched I say that. If I feel dead, I look like a zombie.
    I can remember this one therapist who dumped me saying, "I like you. What you see is what you get. You're like an open book."

    But she couldn't deal with me though..she was scared I'd "fly off"..:dry:

    I'm sorry if this isn't much help but I generally, when I'm depressed, I just can't hide it and just look miserable and teary and a mess. :hug:
    Last edited: Mar 18, 2008
  12. alison

    alison Well-Known Member

    Pretending to be okay is pretty much the one thing I'm good at. :tongue:

    To start, whenever you're talking to someone have a smile on your face. Laugh at everyone's jokes. Always think about if someone else was in your shoes, what would they be excited about... and then tell everyone how excited you are about something (even if it's something little).

    Always ask people how their day is, and listen to their answer. When they tell you something - probe further (not in a nosy way, but in a concerned way). It's pretty easy - most people love talking about themselves and that way they won't talk about you. Ask them about work/classes, family/roommates, how their weekend was or plans for the next weekend. There should be something their at least slightly interesting that you can just keep asking more questions about. When they're talking to you, act interested and keep eye contact. Add commentary, such as 'Wow! That's awesome' or 'Aw man, that's too bad' or 'Oh my god, are you serious?!'. This kind of feedback keeps people going.

    If they ask you how you are doing, say 'Great!'. Think of something little and superficial that happened to you that was good that you can pretend to be excited about. Some of my common examples, "I'm just in such a good mood - I don't know why. This morning on the radio they played my favorite 3 songs in a row!" or "The weather is so nice out, it just makes me feel so happy" or "I woke up this morning before my alarm clock went off! I love waking up naturally, just makes me feel so relaxed. And, with the extra time I got to take an extra long shower!" You get the picture. After you say something happy about yourself to satisfy them, quickly switch the attention back to them.

    Anyways, that's what works for me. It's kind of how I've acted my entire life, even when I was a child and was fine I never really liked to let any sadness show... so I guess I just got a lot of practice. All my friends tell me that I'm one of the happiest people they know. They say I'm confident, optimistic, one girl even tells me I remind her of a puppy because I'm always so excited and happy. They would never guess that at the end of the day I come back to my dorm room and just cry.

    I hope that helps. I don't know if it's the healthy thing to do (it probably isn't), but at least it's an answer to your question. Honestly, I find it easier to fake it every day then to let people in... but I don't know.
  13. Hurted

    Hurted Well-Known Member

    Thanks... but i am just to open... But i want to isolate me from other... they only hurt me... and my friends... they arent really friends... i dont know... guess i will try pills first and if I wont get better in 3 months i will just dump all my friends... I dont know...
  14. malacoba

    malacoba Active Member

    Alison is right I use the same method
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