How Was Everybody's Thanksgiving Today?

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by ToHelp, Nov 27, 2008.

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  1. ToHelp

    ToHelp Well-Known Member

    Yeh for me it was blah no make that BLAH.

    Not a bad day by any measure--and this is precisely what makes holidays so sad for me: A good Christmas or Thanksgiving is one where I don't need to cry too much.

    I've said it before--to real life people who I know: "Those last two months of every year are hands-down the cruelist time for me, and it gets worse by the year, as I observe less and less to live for, let alone feel thankful for.

    Doesn't faze them, it seems. I'd nearly have to get out of their car and, jump on and down on the roof and SCREAM HELP ME AN INVITE ME!!!!

    You might think there to be an easier middleground where I can just say, "would you all have a an extra seat for one more, maybe?" But think about it. You're ASKING for a seat in a family you don't even KNOW!!! isn't that a bit AWKWARD!?!?!? ya, ya think?

    Sorry to yell but it's at once such a passionately ridiculous scenario WHEN YOUR OWN FAMILY DOESN'T INVITE YOU!!!

    It's riculous, serously.

    Oh, I know "how well I have it" materialy. But I am abjectly bereft of people who know me and gve a rat's about me IRL.

    "Well, get out more." Or, "Hey maybe consider going back to AA." Or "John you're guarding and creating your own isolation." Or "Volunteer at a soup kitchen."

    These people do not... they have never been HERE. "HERE" is hard to explain, but many a reader on SF will understand and know.

    It gets harder and harder and likely my destiny will grow clearer and more defined every holiday season.

    GOD I LOATHE these two months, I swear it.

    How was your day?

  2. Oak

    Oak Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    We do not have such thing as Thanksgiving but nonetheless I understand family and friends' gathering and how painful it is to know yet out of our reach.

    If I could, I'd cancel both december and january from the calender :(

  3. ToHelp

    ToHelp Well-Known Member

    :hug: i love u Granny. You are the only person who has responded.

    Not Dec. & Jan. (in the states, January is a whole fresh start) but rather Nov. & Dec. - Those for me are the most cruel times of the year. (We have a Christmas carol that goes, "It's the most wonderful time of the year." That's actually the genesis of my "no, it's the cruelest time of the year" for many out there.)

    See... (since I have have at least ONE person listening, lol) times of merriment and joy during which family is celebrated is a VERY dangerous time for people who lack same.

    And again, yes yes yes I know I foster a lot of this myself. I just feel that loners and depressives need to be reach out TO in some way rather than ignored. Society is at its cruelest when it denies or (so easily) ignores its suffering members.

  4. Oak

    Oak Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    John, ignorance is the mother of all evil. How could I ignore your plea? Many of the things you say in your posts reaches me where it hurts.

    Hope today is a better day for you. Another month to go now till I turn off the clock and pretend the day doesnt exist. Not easy thing to do but that's best i can do to cope.

    Feel free to pm me whenever you want
    Gran xx
  5. LenaLunacy

    LenaLunacy Well-Known Member

    I couldn't agree more. I find december and january the worst months too Granny. Something about the whole christmas thing grates at me, and a new year just means the same old c**p all over again. I struggle to get through these 2 months.
    :hug: to both of you.
  6. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Just spent Thanksgiving with my Mom. It was fine.
  7. ToHelp

    ToHelp Well-Known Member

    I'm especially fond of Gran's advice--just write it off; cancel it. These holidays... you know, I'm not hatin' on cheer and thankfulness, Lord knows.

    It's just I've lately been surprised to find myself "tired"--tired of spirit, tired of soul. Tired of this particular life (if there are other lives, bring 'em!)

    Yet I don't want to do DIE. I'm just tired. And so this year I will finally give myself a rest and not torture my my poor spirit watching others' merriment on TV, or even keeping particular track of the clock.

    I'll bet it sounds strange to many of you but damn. If a thing (holidays) only hurts you, then why not try just not putting yourself your through it?

    These "special" days.... they're societally-created tradition anyway, you know. If they bring you grief and pain, no law says you have to pay homage to them for goodness' sakes.


    You may notice I've not said "Happy Thanksgiving!" *rolls eyes*

    What bullshit. How presumtuous a wish to bestow. It's ok to (to me) to say to my real-life acquaintances but I'm not burdening SF with these traditions. Just not going to do it.

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