Humor me. Why not?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by XXXXXXXXXXX, Nov 4, 2010.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. XXXXXXXXXXX

    XXXXXXXXXXX Member

    xxxxx
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 5, 2010
  2. Borrowed time*

    Borrowed time* Well-Known Member

    What have you heard?
     
  3. ManCG

    ManCG Active Member

    Step 1: Put the sleep aids into the bag
    Step 2: Seal the bag
    Step 3: Make a small hole in bag
    Step 4: Fill bag with helium
    Step 5: Watch bag, along with chosen substances soar into the air
    Step 6: Have ONE shot of tequila and rejoice that you have been given the gift of life.

    Hey man, or woman.
    Trump what I've just said, but I think you should follow my steps :)
    Message me if you ever wanna talk.
    Take care.
     
  4. In Limbo

    In Limbo Forum Buddy

    Excellent stuff ManCG - for a slightly more off-the-wall take on the gift of life, here's Bill Bryson:

    The way I see it, there are three reasons never to be unhappy.

    First, you were born. This in itself is a remarkable achievement. Did you know that each time your father ejaculated (and frankly he did it quite a lot) he produced roughly 25 million spermatozoa—enough to repopulate Britain every two days or so? For you to have been born, not only did you have to be among the few batches of sperm that had even a theoretical chance of prospering—in itself quite a long shot—but you then had to win a race against 24,999,999 or so other wriggling contenders, all rushing to swim the English Channel of your mother’s vagina in order to be the first ashore at the fertile egg of Boulogne, as it were. Being born was easily the most remarkable achievement of your whole life. And think: You could just as easily have been a flatworm.

    Second, you are alive. For the tiniest moment in the span of eternity you have the miraculous privilege to exist. For endless aeons you did not. Soon you will cease to be once more. That you are able to sit here right now in this one never-to-be-repeated moment, reading this book, eating bonbons, dreaming about hot sex with that scrumptious person from accounts, speculatively sniffing your armpits, doing whatever you are doing—just existing—is really wondrous beyond belief.

    Third, you have plenty to eat, you live in a time of peace, and “Tie a Yellow Ribbon Round the Ole Oak Tree” will never be number one again.
     
  5. XXXXXXXXXXX

    XXXXXXXXXXX Member

    it all
     
  6. XXXXXXXXXXX

    XXXXXXXXXXX Member

    haha. nice imagination. you got me I haven't heard that one yet.
     
  7. ManCG

    ManCG Active Member

    I hope you appreciated that. I got a 'haha' out of you, which is always a good sign :)

    Come on man, you seem like a perfectly decent person. Throw away the substances, and come and chill on the forum and chat to some decent people :)
     
  8. XXXXXXXXXXX

    XXXXXXXXXXX Member

    being happy or unhappy is just an illusion.

    Says who?

    Or its not.

    Who lives in a time of peace? lol
     
  9. XXXXXXXXXXX

    XXXXXXXXXXX Member


    Sounds good but its not that easy. Pity is very temporary and when it runs you you end up feeling worse.

    What are you guys doing here? are you doctors? Nothing to do? No GF/BF? stoners?
     
  10. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    I'm a stoner doctor with no transexual partner and therefore nothing to do
     
  11. XXXXXXXXXXX

    XXXXXXXXXXX Member

    Sounds like you need the bag more than I do.
     
  12. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    :laugh: Pretty much
     
  13. Johnnyc

    Johnnyc Well-Known Member

    Your a stoner doctor too, what are the odds
     
  14. XXXXXXXXXXX

    XXXXXXXXXXX Member

    I can't watch tv because it sets shit off inside of me. i can't keep a relationship because bitches are crazy, i can't keep friends because i don't take any shit that comes with them. I drink, I smoke.

    no friends. no family. 2 years ive been sitting alone. I go to work, pretend like I give a shit and then I come home.

    And then I tell myself its all my fault. Because how we live is our choice right?
     
  15. XXXXXXXXXXX

    XXXXXXXXXXX Member

    I fucking sit here contemplating. And I've thought out every angle there is. The only thing that keeps me from doing it is asking my self "why haven't you done it yet."

    that question is getting old and i can't answer it.
     
  16. XXXXXXXXXXX

    XXXXXXXXXXX Member

    trust me i'm not here becaue I think any of you can say anything that would talk me out of it. I'm just here to see myself, what I write what I say. But thanks for the humor
     
  17. In Limbo

    In Limbo Forum Buddy

    Yes, and the future is a choice, the past is the past. Whatever happens stays happened.

    But you have it inside you to turn the future around, because as you said yourself, that is your choice.
     
  18. In Limbo

    In Limbo Forum Buddy

    I think that that in a nutshell is the central problem for many depressed or suicidal people - and I speak as one who's been both, we become outstanding at lying to ourselves.
     
  19. XXXXXXXXXXX

    XXXXXXXXXXX Member

    the only choice we have is what we do based on what happens in the future.

    hypothetically... i go to work in the morning come home and here I am again. I'm stuck. i don't know what to do.
     
  20. XXXXXXXXXXX

    XXXXXXXXXXX Member

    You guys picture it. wake up, go to work come home. No phone calls, no holidays, nothing to look forward to and if you did, you know its only temporary before you are right back where you were. And then something does come along and makes you feel good. then its gone.
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.