i had the gun, wasnt sure if it was loaded or not, but my dad ussually keeps it that way, it had a clip anyway. i turned the safety off, pointed it to my head, and almost pulled the trigger all the way, i was so close. my parents dont understand deppression is a sickness, it isnt neccesarily triggered by reason. then i sit there and listen to my family laugh at depression, like its so stupid, and theyll ramble on and on simply because they dont know. more of all they dont know i have it. and its so hard because the treat me like i have the sanity of a normal person. i remember when my father thretend to hit me, the next day he told me he was really close, and that he had to put me in my place..what??? like im an animal? like i cant question him? like im suppose to be completely submissive...god im so sick of it.. im F**ing tired of it all. i just want it to end.. whn i say were moving thats exactly what i mean. im still in with my family unfortunantly. i dont see any F**ing point in actually being alive. ever since i was young, i can remember crying a lot. esspecially when i did sometihng wrong, i didnt even get a spanking because i felt so bad about what i did there was litterally no point, and i would cry right then and there. ive always been that way, and im just sick of it.. im sick of it all.. god i want it to end:unsure: i feel like a peice of merchandise, in which is defective and broken, so my father whats to change me out for one that does work.. after all, who wants something worthless and defective?