Hello, I just signed up here. I am 16, live with my mom and dad, don't have brothers or sisters. I am actually in high school. Recently I have been thinking a lot about suicide, this might be weird since I have a loving family, friends and people I love. But I have been thinking of my future. I am wondering if life is really worth living. I have found more stress and pain than happiness until now. When my grandfather died I was expecting to be immensely sad, but I wasn't at all. I must be a horrible selfish person. Why would I go on living if it is to do unpleasant things and live a miserably and harm other people's feelings . I am also very curious to know if something happens after death. Oh if only there was a button to turn me off I would hit it as soon as possible. The only fact holding me back from committing suicide is my self pain. Yes that seems very selfish. I want to kill myself because I can get to love other people as much as they love me. I am a horrible horrible person and my wonderful surrounding doesn't deserve to have to support a burden like me. <mod edit - methods> Can anybody find me a reason to live? Everyday I am trying to find a reason but I don't. Why am I even bothering you by posting this message. I am wasting your time. I am a waste. Why am I not dead yet?