to everyone in my life. I am always feeling depressed and sick and now it has cost me my job. My poor family has better things to do than worry about a middle aged ugly useless woman like me. I am nothing but a burden. It is my own fault. There is no one to blame but myself. No one. I know it is a fact that everything in this world would improve if I was not in it. I am trapped in this spiraling vortex of selfishness, laziness, fear, and regret. I think all hope may be gone.