And so are you.
Sometimes I feel unlikeable.
And sometimes I feel like everyone dislikes me.
I feel like I'm going to do terrible things at times and I hate that.
I'm being bullied in my head, but my head makes it seem so damn real. It's like I'm really currently being treated like shit by a bunch of losers. It's so weird. It's all in my head and none of it is real, right? Why do I imagine such things? I feel really odd and angry. I have some fucking problems and I know meaner people would find it hilarious. I hear them in my mind - they exist conceptually, but aren't actual specific people - bullying me. Laughing at me, treating me like I'm a joke, like nothing better describes me more than LOSER. But what if it doesn't matter? What if, in my mind and outside of it, it doesn't really matter? I am a human being created by a situation, created by a circumstance, with a birth decided by chance. Of all sperm to reach the egg, it was the one carrying the 23 male chromosomes that would become me. I am a miracle as all humans are miracles.
Alan Moore put it best in Watchmen:
"But...listen. You've just been saying life is meaningless, so how can...?"
"I changed my mind."
"But...why?"
"Thermodynamic miracles...events with odds against so astronomical they're effectively impossible, like oxygen spontaneously becoming gold. I long to observe such a thing. And yet, in each human coupling, a thousand million sperm vie for a single egg. Multiply those odds by countless generations, against the odds of your ancestors being alive; meeting; siring this precise son; that exact daughter...until your mother loves a man she has every right to hate, and of that union, of the thousand million children competing for fertilization, it was you, only you that emerged. To distill so specific a form from that chaos of improbability, like turning air to gold...that is the crowning unlikelihood. The thermodynamic miracle."
"But...if me, my birth, if that's a thermodynamic miracle...I mean, you could say that about anybody in the world!"
"Yes. Anybody in the world...but the world is so full of people, so crowded with these miracles that they become commonplace and we forget...I forget. We gaze continually at the world and it grows dull in our perceptions. Yet seen from another's vantage point, as if new, it may still take the breath away."
-A conversation between Laurie Juspeczyk/Silk Spectre and Dr. Jon Osterman/Dr. Manhattan
(You can read some of that on this scan)
Don't you all see with your mind's eye? It's difficult to see, but the fact is there! It's difficult to see the entire universe all the time. The universe as it exists is a miracle itself! Think of it, it wasn't destiny that it just popped into place. No, there was a chance that it would come into being and there was a chance that there would be...whatever! Scientists aren't entirely sure of what existed before the Big Bang. Some think that the Big Bang was the result of a collision between our three-dimensional world and another less than the width of a proton away from ours.
I'm no science expert, but that shit is crazy. Can you imagine...that? At all? Could you comprehend the fact that the scale of the universe is something that cannot be truly comprehended? Hell, existence itself is even 'worse' in that way: there may be more out that than just this universe! While I may know no more about space than what I learned in elementary and middle school, I still find this stuff simply incredible.
Similarly, think of the planet Earth. I'm sure you've seen this picture before. It's rather famous. If you've never seen it...do you see that little blue dot to the right in the picture? It's Earth. It's a picture of the Earth as taken by the Voyager 1 spacecraft in 1990 from a distance of about 6 billion kilometers from Earth. For perspective's sake, the damn thing was launched in 1977. It took 13 fucking years to get that far from Earth! Thirteen motherfucking years. Damn. (How about the next time scientists send out a space probe, we fucking wave at the camera, eh? How about a nice, big group fucking picture?) We, as human beings, will probably never travel that far from Earth. Why would we? The odds of another reachable planet like the Earth that could sustain life existing is pretty darn low.
And the Earth, just like the rest of us and the universe, was not destined to exist either. In the modern age, we have a better understanding of it all than anyone before us ever did. This shit is common knowledge, too. We actually have more knowledge of our surroundings, as well of ourselves, than any ancient civilization ever did. (But that's actually digressing from the point.)
The point is, this planet did not have to materialize. It just did. It formed from the solar nebula, a disk-shaped mass of dust and gas left over from the formation of the sun (a source of life for this planet). The Earth - humanity's cradle, living room, home, mall, office, workplace - is fucking 4.54 billion years old.
And somehow, life happened. It just appeared. Scientists don't even fucking know how. But it did. It happened. It wasn't destined to happen, but as it so turns out, the living (think of that word - "living" - really, think about it, it's related words, and what they mean) conditions on this planet were just right for something to spring up. The first living organisms on this Earth are thought to be single-cell prokaryotes - the common life between all organisms that ever lived! Over time, billions and billions of different species have evolved from these prokaryotes, specializing in certain areas and adapting to them. The Earth gave birth to biological diversity; not only is it the only place ever where living things exist, but the billions of different types of species that have existed, exist today, and will exist in the future is simply staggering when a step is taken back and the picture of life looked at.
The sun and the Earth's atmosphere gave birth to life - the one thing that truly makes Earth unique from the rest of existence. There is no life recorded anywhere else, not in the vast outstretches of dark matter in the universe. Living things! Things that have a behavior, a biological process, things that are conscious, and are aware of their surroundings. Things that could evolve.
But existence is nothing more than circumstance: there have been many mass extinctions events throughout history. Billions of species have forever died. Billions of species incapable of sentience as we are. You may find that to be hubris, but hear the human race out.
Somehow, after the dinosaurs were wiped out (leaving behind reptiles) and mammals inherited the Earth, the human race, homo sapiens sapiens evolved from other primates. Capable of abstract thought, language, introspection, problem-solving, self-awareness, rationality, and sapience, our earliest ancestors sought all it saw: the world, which was the entire universe to them. Perhaps unintentionally, we took it.
And we tried to give meaning to it all. Something developed that the universe hadn't seen: culture. Animals that we hunted became deities and so did the sun, the skies, the lands, the rivers, lakes, the weather, and so many instances more. Anything that we didn't have an answer for became something to worship (and still to this day, we look to religion for answers). It was irrational, but we didn't exactly have the proper tools, technology, and knowledge to know anything. Knowledge is necessary to obtain more knowledge. It wasn't much, but it was a start.
We invented government to organize ourselves into a society to stop the chaos.
We created technology from prior technology for any purpose we could think of.
We created fiction from myths and legends to entertain our minds.
We created music to give our hearing sense some pleasure.
It was a miracle any of this even happened. There wasn't anything guiding over the human race, making sure we made those choices. We just did.
During all of this progress, your ancestors procreated, gave birth to their sons/daughters, who procreated and so on until you emerged, crying and screaming from your mother's womb. You just happened. You didn't choose to happen, either your parents chose for you or they didn't. You're here now though, but you weren't fated to be. You aren't "supposed" to be alive, but you aren't "supposed" to be dead, either. You just exist. What you do with your life is entirely your decision, however.
Life is so precious. So very precious. How could it not be? There will never be another you again. There will never be another person ever with your personality, exact looks, thoughts, feelings, DNA, or anything that makes you, you. From this perspective, the garbage spewed from the person you hate directed at you doesn't matter. It's just bullshit that needs to be ignored and forgotten. You, I, and We must forsake any insult and all bullies to survive.
You're the center of your reality. Your reality is unique and is made up of your worldview, as well as your experiences (I, for one, believe there are two types of realities: the universal reality, made up of scientific facts and theories, and a personal reality unique to every one of us). Life is circumstantial: it may throw you into shitty situations sometimes, but that doesn't mean it's not worth living. The human experience, all the love, happiness, friendships, accomplishments, and pleasure make it all worth it.
Hey, buddy. You, reading this article.
Yes, you.
You're a miracle. You sprang into existence regardless of the odds. The chances of another sperm cell hitting that egg instead of the one that makes you, you were very high. It's very possible that someone else could've been born. Someone who looked different, had a different personality, had different thoughts, feelings, and DNA could've lived on this Earth instead of you. Someone entirely different but in your place. But that person went unborn - he or she just doesn't exist.
But you do. Be happy that you do. Be happy that you're here.
Sometimes I feel unlikeable.
And sometimes I feel like everyone dislikes me.
I feel like I'm going to do terrible things at times and I hate that.
I'm being bullied in my head, but my head makes it seem so damn real. It's like I'm really currently being treated like shit by a bunch of losers. It's so weird. It's all in my head and none of it is real, right? Why do I imagine such things? I feel really odd and angry. I have some fucking problems and I know meaner people would find it hilarious. I hear them in my mind - they exist conceptually, but aren't actual specific people - bullying me. Laughing at me, treating me like I'm a joke, like nothing better describes me more than LOSER. But what if it doesn't matter? What if, in my mind and outside of it, it doesn't really matter? I am a human being created by a situation, created by a circumstance, with a birth decided by chance. Of all sperm to reach the egg, it was the one carrying the 23 male chromosomes that would become me. I am a miracle as all humans are miracles.
Alan Moore put it best in Watchmen:
"But...listen. You've just been saying life is meaningless, so how can...?"
"I changed my mind."
"But...why?"
"Thermodynamic miracles...events with odds against so astronomical they're effectively impossible, like oxygen spontaneously becoming gold. I long to observe such a thing. And yet, in each human coupling, a thousand million sperm vie for a single egg. Multiply those odds by countless generations, against the odds of your ancestors being alive; meeting; siring this precise son; that exact daughter...until your mother loves a man she has every right to hate, and of that union, of the thousand million children competing for fertilization, it was you, only you that emerged. To distill so specific a form from that chaos of improbability, like turning air to gold...that is the crowning unlikelihood. The thermodynamic miracle."
"But...if me, my birth, if that's a thermodynamic miracle...I mean, you could say that about anybody in the world!"
"Yes. Anybody in the world...but the world is so full of people, so crowded with these miracles that they become commonplace and we forget...I forget. We gaze continually at the world and it grows dull in our perceptions. Yet seen from another's vantage point, as if new, it may still take the breath away."
-A conversation between Laurie Juspeczyk/Silk Spectre and Dr. Jon Osterman/Dr. Manhattan
(You can read some of that on this scan)
Don't you all see with your mind's eye? It's difficult to see, but the fact is there! It's difficult to see the entire universe all the time. The universe as it exists is a miracle itself! Think of it, it wasn't destiny that it just popped into place. No, there was a chance that it would come into being and there was a chance that there would be...whatever! Scientists aren't entirely sure of what existed before the Big Bang. Some think that the Big Bang was the result of a collision between our three-dimensional world and another less than the width of a proton away from ours.
I'm no science expert, but that shit is crazy. Can you imagine...that? At all? Could you comprehend the fact that the scale of the universe is something that cannot be truly comprehended? Hell, existence itself is even 'worse' in that way: there may be more out that than just this universe! While I may know no more about space than what I learned in elementary and middle school, I still find this stuff simply incredible.
Similarly, think of the planet Earth. I'm sure you've seen this picture before. It's rather famous. If you've never seen it...do you see that little blue dot to the right in the picture? It's Earth. It's a picture of the Earth as taken by the Voyager 1 spacecraft in 1990 from a distance of about 6 billion kilometers from Earth. For perspective's sake, the damn thing was launched in 1977. It took 13 fucking years to get that far from Earth! Thirteen motherfucking years. Damn. (How about the next time scientists send out a space probe, we fucking wave at the camera, eh? How about a nice, big group fucking picture?) We, as human beings, will probably never travel that far from Earth. Why would we? The odds of another reachable planet like the Earth that could sustain life existing is pretty darn low.
And the Earth, just like the rest of us and the universe, was not destined to exist either. In the modern age, we have a better understanding of it all than anyone before us ever did. This shit is common knowledge, too. We actually have more knowledge of our surroundings, as well of ourselves, than any ancient civilization ever did. (But that's actually digressing from the point.)
The point is, this planet did not have to materialize. It just did. It formed from the solar nebula, a disk-shaped mass of dust and gas left over from the formation of the sun (a source of life for this planet). The Earth - humanity's cradle, living room, home, mall, office, workplace - is fucking 4.54 billion years old.
And somehow, life happened. It just appeared. Scientists don't even fucking know how. But it did. It happened. It wasn't destined to happen, but as it so turns out, the living (think of that word - "living" - really, think about it, it's related words, and what they mean) conditions on this planet were just right for something to spring up. The first living organisms on this Earth are thought to be single-cell prokaryotes - the common life between all organisms that ever lived! Over time, billions and billions of different species have evolved from these prokaryotes, specializing in certain areas and adapting to them. The Earth gave birth to biological diversity; not only is it the only place ever where living things exist, but the billions of different types of species that have existed, exist today, and will exist in the future is simply staggering when a step is taken back and the picture of life looked at.
The sun and the Earth's atmosphere gave birth to life - the one thing that truly makes Earth unique from the rest of existence. There is no life recorded anywhere else, not in the vast outstretches of dark matter in the universe. Living things! Things that have a behavior, a biological process, things that are conscious, and are aware of their surroundings. Things that could evolve.
But existence is nothing more than circumstance: there have been many mass extinctions events throughout history. Billions of species have forever died. Billions of species incapable of sentience as we are. You may find that to be hubris, but hear the human race out.
Somehow, after the dinosaurs were wiped out (leaving behind reptiles) and mammals inherited the Earth, the human race, homo sapiens sapiens evolved from other primates. Capable of abstract thought, language, introspection, problem-solving, self-awareness, rationality, and sapience, our earliest ancestors sought all it saw: the world, which was the entire universe to them. Perhaps unintentionally, we took it.
And we tried to give meaning to it all. Something developed that the universe hadn't seen: culture. Animals that we hunted became deities and so did the sun, the skies, the lands, the rivers, lakes, the weather, and so many instances more. Anything that we didn't have an answer for became something to worship (and still to this day, we look to religion for answers). It was irrational, but we didn't exactly have the proper tools, technology, and knowledge to know anything. Knowledge is necessary to obtain more knowledge. It wasn't much, but it was a start.
We invented government to organize ourselves into a society to stop the chaos.
We created technology from prior technology for any purpose we could think of.
We created fiction from myths and legends to entertain our minds.
We created music to give our hearing sense some pleasure.
It was a miracle any of this even happened. There wasn't anything guiding over the human race, making sure we made those choices. We just did.
During all of this progress, your ancestors procreated, gave birth to their sons/daughters, who procreated and so on until you emerged, crying and screaming from your mother's womb. You just happened. You didn't choose to happen, either your parents chose for you or they didn't. You're here now though, but you weren't fated to be. You aren't "supposed" to be alive, but you aren't "supposed" to be dead, either. You just exist. What you do with your life is entirely your decision, however.
Life is so precious. So very precious. How could it not be? There will never be another you again. There will never be another person ever with your personality, exact looks, thoughts, feelings, DNA, or anything that makes you, you. From this perspective, the garbage spewed from the person you hate directed at you doesn't matter. It's just bullshit that needs to be ignored and forgotten. You, I, and We must forsake any insult and all bullies to survive.
You're the center of your reality. Your reality is unique and is made up of your worldview, as well as your experiences (I, for one, believe there are two types of realities: the universal reality, made up of scientific facts and theories, and a personal reality unique to every one of us). Life is circumstantial: it may throw you into shitty situations sometimes, but that doesn't mean it's not worth living. The human experience, all the love, happiness, friendships, accomplishments, and pleasure make it all worth it.
Hey, buddy. You, reading this article.
Yes, you.
You're a miracle. You sprang into existence regardless of the odds. The chances of another sperm cell hitting that egg instead of the one that makes you, you were very high. It's very possible that someone else could've been born. Someone who looked different, had a different personality, had different thoughts, feelings, and DNA could've lived on this Earth instead of you. Someone entirely different but in your place. But that person went unborn - he or she just doesn't exist.
But you do. Be happy that you do. Be happy that you're here.
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