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I am a PERSON not _____ (may trigger)

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Songstress, Feb 6, 2012.

  1. Songstress

    Songstress Well-Known Member

    Right now I feel like everyone in my life seems to expect me to be something I'm not. My parents expect my mother expects me to be her secretary, cook, waitress, and maid in general.

    My fiance seems to expect me to be there to always fix his moods, to be there and just let him take anger out on me when he isn't even angry at me.

    And I just want to have a fucking chance to not be so angry that I'm swearing when no one can hear me and crying when I'm alone. I get so angry that I want to punch things, to beat the shit out of pillows, and angry enough that my normally more refined vocabulary is reduced to fuck, shit, bitch and a slew of other swear words because if I'm angry and can't let it out I swear like a mother fucking sailor. I don't want to be that person, but when I'm upset and angry I just turn into a ball of white on fury, but I'm not allowed to even show how angry I am when anyone else is around because I"m the one that doesn't fucking matter so I just need to fucking sit there an stew and be the one that everyone else takes their anger out on.
  2. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    SO relate to what you've written!
    I cannot remember the laast time anyone asked me what I thought, or wanted.
    This seems to have reduced me to a volcanic mass of anger too.
    I have no answer to it I'm afraid.
    If you work out what to do, aside from mass homicide :laugh: let me know!