This is my first post here... kind of a last stitch effort before I check myself into the hospital and try to get them to keep me there. I am 18 years old. I recently moved in with my boyfriend of six months, we are renting a house together. I'm a full time student and just left my job less than a week ago. He told me I could because he makes good money now and I need to find something I am happy doing. But things have only got worse since I left my job. I thought it would be nice to see him more, but we only seem to fall apart more and more every day. Sure, sometimes I'm mean or unfair, but I always recognize it and apologize. I've been working hard on that since we moved in together because he told me it bothered him and pushed him away. Now the tables seem to have turned, he yells at me and gets angry at me for the smallest things. I try to talk to him about it, I give him time to calm down. But after he's calm, if I want to talk about it again, he gets more angry and asks why I brought it up because he's over it. So I've tried to stop doing that, to just let things go. I thought it was unfair that since he's done talking about it, I have to be too. But trying gets me nowhere, only makes it worse. If I try to tell him how I feel, he blames himself in a condescending way, saying I always say it's his fault and he starts everything. But I readily admit when I'm wrong because he asked me to. So lately I've just been taking the blame for everything, backing down and letting him win. I cry all the time and have resorted to cutting several times and have attempted suicide twice over the last month. He works every day from 9 until 5:30, giving me more alone time than I can handle. Today I told him how I feel, and he told me he was going to see his father after work instead of coming home. I don't think I can handle being alone that long, so I signed up for this forum. Hello.